Starring - first story I've ever written

Hey, this is the first story I’ve ever written, so please be a little gentle with the critiques… It’s called Starring

A list goes up on a white board. Names - The school play this year’s cast list. In front of it stands a black haired boy, wearing black jeans, and a band top that said “Linkin Park,” a band he had never listened to, but that he knew was popular. He wants to fit in, but he was too gothy and nerdy to stand a chance, and so instead of fitting in, he goes for what he’s passionate about - drama. A dream to become a performer in later life.

Across the school, sitting on a bench with a bunch of his friends, a blonde haired boy throws his football in the air, trying to impress two girls that were walking nearby. He laughs as one of the boys tries to wink, but fails miserably, and then he catches sight of his girl, Amber. Her golden hair glistens in the sunlight, and then he stands up as she comes near, and stops her. His friends tease him as they hug, their common greeting, and he hears his closest friend, Kevin, say, "Oh, dude, why do you have to do that every time you see each other. I mean, aren’t you humiliated?, but he just ignores him, he has eyes only for Amber.

Above, watching from the sky, sits a diapered boy, viewing the thoughts of both boys below, and he finds it fascinating that each of these boys, both oblivious to the other, have the same deep internal desire. A desire it was his duty to fulfill.

Taylor James, the blond football player, sits in bed, looking around at his posters, and trying to find solace after the argument that had just happened between Amber and him via phone. He throws the football up, something that usually always calmed him down, but it wasn’t helping tonight. So, he looks into the sky, remembering the stories that his dad used to tell him about the stars before he was too old. As he looks, he wonder where all the magic he dreamed of when he was young, went. Surely it couldn’t have all been a lie. As he remains gazing up at the sky, catching all his favorite stars and the stories behind them, the corner of his eye sees, in the slight openness of his cupboard, his old toys, specifically his attempt at making his favourite Disney character, Pinocchio, out of pegs, when he was, like, five. I really should have thrown out those toys by now, he thinks, I mean, who still has kid’s toys at 14?. As he stands to close the cupboard, almost too coincidentally, a shooting star appears in the sky, almost too rapidly for Taylor to say his wish, but in his mind he says it three times and i shocked at what he’s actually wishing for. He starts saying it aloud, "I want to wear - ", but then is stopped.

“Don’t say the wish aloud, then it won’t come true. Gosh, don’t you know the rules?” says a blue haired teenager sitting on Taylor’s bed.

Re: Starring - first story I’ve ever written

“Don’t say the wish aloud, then it won’t come true. Gosh, don’t you know the rules?” says a blue haired teenager, looking to be about 17, sitting on Taylor’s bed.He was clothed fashionably, wearing a red top an jeans that Taylor loved. But, more specifically, it was what Taylor saw under the jeans - something that looked very much like what Taylor wanted to wear, but Taylor could only mutter one question, as the boy remained sitting on Taylor’s bed, making him feel uncomfortable.

“Wh- Who’re you?”

“Oh, hi Taylor, I’m what can be called a Star Buddy, although I’ve been called many other things before.” At the look of confusion on Taylor’s face, he continued, “I think you might understand the term Imaginary Friend a bit better. My name’s Rudy, and I’m here to make your wish exactly what you want it to be in your life. I’m not judging, but it is a bit of a weird wish, isn’t it?”

“Uh, I guess…” Taylor says, his voice going slightly higher as Rudy addressed his wish almost directly, “But, y’know, I just want to be able to live my life again without wondering what it would be like to have stayed wearing them. I guess it’s always been one of my dreams…”

“You don’t need to explain yourself to me,” Rudy says, as he pulls his pants down to fully show his slightly wet diaper to Taylor. “I’m like you, someone who also wanted to wear them, and now it’s my job to make little boys like you and me happy.”

“You mean, you also chose to wear [and here he whispers] diapers

Around him, the world changes until he is in a room with soft toy carpeting that he used to love playing with, as well as many other childish things around him, but he was only watching Rudy, who was wetting his diaper that was already showing to the whole world, strongly. Rudy was sitting on a large bed-crib.

Re: Starring - first story I’ve ever written

What a great start. You should continue this story when you get the chance.

Re: Starring - first story I’ve ever written

[Sorry for such a long wait, but this is the first opportunity I’ve had….]

"Sorry, it’s a trigger word, whenever anyone says it, me and whoever I’m talking to, get transported here. It’s my Star, my home. And, yes, I chose too. I made a wish, a few years ago, for two things, magic and diapers, and my Star Buddy, or imaginary friend, suggested that I become one too, and I’ve been a Buddy ever since. Whenever I’m here, I’m automatically just in a diaper, it’s more comfortable that way. If you don’t mind, can you tell me why you want to wear them?

Taylor sits down on the crib-bed, a bed because it was low enough for you to sit down on it, with your feet still touching the floor, but a crib because of the wooden bars surrounding three sides of the bed. As he sits down, he almost squeals in delight - but reminds himself not to, after all he was too old to do that - as the plastic sheet brings back memories of when he was seven, and still wet the bed quite often.

“I dunno, actually. I feel like there’s a part of me missing, and if I put one on, it won’t be any more. I guess it’s because of the comfort, the want to feel protected, and hugged. I suppose it’s just silly, because I’ve got so much more to worry about, but I feel like it’ll take my worries away.”

“That’s actually really cool,” Rudy says with a hint of jealousy in his voice, “I wish I knew why I wanted to wear diapers so much, but, meh. Now, you sent up a wish to me, and it’s my duty to fulfill that wish, so tell me, what do you want your diaper life to be?”

Taylor doesn’t realise that he actually has a choice, and so he is quiet for a few seconds, and then says, timidly, “How 'bout just the normal life of a diaper boy?”

“Yeah, I can do that. I need to explain the rules of all this to you now. I’d explain them later, 'cuz they’re very annoying, but, you know them before you enter your wishworld. After 4 in the morning, your world will change, but understand that it is not reality, it is an alternate universe, a wishworld. You can change anything there, but each time you do, a little of your power runs out, and you are heading back to reality. When you come back to reality, you will not be the boy I see before me now, and nor will life be the way you remember it. You have this [he takes out a device that look like an old Nokia phone, but slightly fancier] - it’s called a wishometer, but I’ll explain that to you in the wishworld. What is a diaper boy in your opinion, though?”

“A normal teenage boy that wears diapers, and where diapers are an important and accepted part of his life.”

“Cool. I just want you to know one thing before we get to the fun and interesting part of tonight - you do understand that you won’t be able to use the potty anymore, hey.”

“Yeah, that’s awesome!” Taylor says, forgetting that he’s supposed to be acting mature.

And with that, Rudy makes a pack of diapers appear out of thin air. It’s a blue package that has a boy that looks like Rudy, but is blonde-haired, and about two years younger. On the pack, it says, your wish is about to come true in big writing, and then, in even bigger writing, “Wishes” - Teen Diapers.

Re: Starring - first story I’ve ever written

Not bad. I’m always a bit skeptical about magical stories because people tend to overextend magical capabilities to the point where it just becomes ridiculous. But you’ve done a good job so far.

Also, I’m kind of a grammar stickler, and you’ve got a couple errors here and there with punctuation and wording. For example, “always usually” is an oxymoron. But not a huge deal; your overall writing style is very good.

Re: Starring - first story I’ve ever written - chapter 1 finished

[Hi guys, I’m hoping to post the rest of the first chapter today. Thanks for being patient, and enjoy]

“I hope you don’t mind I chose my personalized brand. Yeah, that’s me on the cover - I’m cute there, huh? These are thicker, and go higher up the tummy, and, through a little bit of magic, have the designs you think up on them. Now, for the wish to come true, you need to take a diaper, and put it on yourself.”

“Uh, okay, but I, uh, don’t know how,” Taylor says with excitement in his voice, but scared that it won’t be as good as he’s imagined it.

“I’d put it on you myself, but the charm only works if the person who put it on is the one who’s wearing it. I’ll talk you through it, though.”

Rudy opens the pack with ease, but Taylor realises that it looks quite hard to do. After the pack is opened, Rudy smells the diapers for a second [it’s one of the most enjoyable thins about diaper wearing, and the smell is just bliss], and then give the nearest one to himself to Taylor.

To Taylor, the diaper is the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, but he’s surprised how diapers looked before they were actually on someone. The diaper, folded up, is still enough to make Taylor excited, though. As he looks down at the folded diaper, all he can see are the words, “Wishes - Super Absorbent” and what looked to be his old favourite teddy bear, Mr Cuddles.

“I knew you wear a teddy person, I just knew it!” exclaims Rudy as he sees Mr Cuddles on the diaper.

Taylor opens the diaper up, getting it into the general hourglass shape all disposable diapers have. There are two sticky tabs on either side of what Taylor assumes to be the back of the diaper, and then, in the front of the diaper, there is this weird blue plastic stuff with Mr Cuddles on, which Taylor looks at in confusion, wondering what it’s there for.

“Oh,” says Rudy, noticing Taylor’s lost expression, “that’s a wetness indicator. You see the numbers on either side of your teddy?” Taylor hadn’t, but saw now that there were three numbers on either side - 3 being the closest to Mr Cuddles, and 1 the furthest. “They will tell you how wet your diaper is, and when it is too wet, your teddy will disappear. It’s helpful in telling you when to change, or when you’re going to leak. It’s better at the front, for well, obvious reasons.”

Taylor pulls down his pants and undies, slightly embarrassed, but he trusts Rudy, and then pulls the open diaper up between his legs, and then tries to tape the top tapes up, but then is told that it is easier to put a diaper on against a wall, and to start with the bottom tapes, as they make a tighter and stronger fit.

So, he starts with the bottom tapes, and clumsily tapes his diaper up, and, although it isn’t as snug as it could be, it still feels glorious to Taylor.

“Oh, I hope you enjoy tomorrow, Taylor. I’m going to take you back to your room now, where I think you’ll fall asleep quite soon, you’re already yawning. And then, at about 3:55 tomorrow morning, you will suddenly wake up. At four on the dot, your wish will come true. You won’t feel any different, but your life and your entire world will be. Until four, this is goodnight. I can’t wait until you are a true, real diaper boy. It’s just so exciting.”

With that, Rudy takes Taylor’s hands, and they appear back in Taylor’s room - Taylor lying on his bed in his normal pajamas (you can’t even see the diaper underneath, but Taylor knows it is there, and grins), and Rudy floating above close to the roof, trying to sing Taylor a lullaby, and, although Rudy was tone deaf, Taylor was soon asleep.

[END OF CHAPTER ONE - sorry it took 3 posts]
[Please critique, if you’ve got any comments, ways to make it better. Thanks, Thisonecoolguy for commenting. I realize that one can go overboard with magical stories, but I liked the concept, so I went for it. I am trying, in this story, to try still keep it realistic, even in Taylor’s wishworld, but magic will still happen. I understand that there may be errors in terms of grammar, most likely in terms of tense, and if I have time, i will try and change that, but at the moment, I’m too excited to find out what happens next. In terms of your comment on “usually always,” I have checked that out, and it is actually correct grammar. It means that that is something that calms him down always, but for some reason it isn’t calming him down today. Hope that clears that matter up]

Re: Starring - first story I’ve ever written

CHAPTER TWO

Taylor’s view At 3:54:59

I wake up, and look around the room that I now realize I’m seeing for the last time. The early morning sub-light that enters from my windows (I sleep with my curtains open) lets me see the shapes of everything in my room. And as I look out from my bed next to my window, I take everything in, not knowing what is going to change. I look at my computer, at the thin flat screen that we just recently bought for it, and smile as I review in my mind the specs it has. It’s a proper gaming computer, and I enjoy playing games on it. Amber comes quickly to my mind, and I want to forget her, but I still wonder what’s going to happen to all her personal pictures on the wall. I know she won’t be part of my next life. She made her opinion on diapers quite clear. She would never date a diaper boy. I then notice the outlines of the pictures on my cupboard. They’re pics of me and Kevin hiking up a mountain nearby, taken last year. It was one of the best experiences of my life, but I am still eager to experience my new life. The dark blue walls in my room look almost black in the dark light, and I remember that I used to have to sleep with a nightlight because it was so dark. I wonder if a diaper boy would have walls this colour. I then notice two doors at the other side of my room, and smile at the one to the right, because I know that won’t be there any more. Its not like I’m going to need that room any more. As I look at the door, I realize that I have a pressing bladder that needs to be emptied, . I stand up, and walk across the room, almost tripping over the clothes that I threw down on the floor earlier, and enter the bathroom, pulling down my pants as I go. I don’t like my pajama pants, and I hope that they become something better and more comfortable at four, but that’s not really what’s on my mind right now. I notice a white bit of clothing covering a certain part of my body. I hadn’t forgotten that it was there, but it had traveled to the back of my mind. I decide to try slip it off like you would undies, because I would like to use the toilet for the last time. After all, its weird enough to want to wear diapers, but to pee in them on purpose, now that was just creepy. I guess I like diapers, but I want my diaper wearing be the same as a babies. I’m not opposed to people peeing them on purpose, but that’s just not something that I would like to do. It’s not one of my desires. As I start trying to pull them down - Flip! These diapers were tight - I hear Rudy’s voice.

“That might not be a good idea, hey, Taylor. If that diaper is off your body before 4 am,even just for a second, and i think your pee’ll take longer than that, the spell will become a messed up version of itself. It’s a better idea to keep the diaper on. Sorry, but it looks like you’re going to have to pee yourself on purpose. I’ll help you, though. Drink as much water as you can. I’ll tell you what else to do after that.” I don’t like what Rudy is saying, but I’m actually a little excited to see what a wet diaper feels like. Maybe it’s a bit weird that my mind changed so quickly, but I guess it’s because I actually do want to experience a wet diaper. Earlier I didn’t want to because I wanted to experience my last proper pee, but now I know that I don’t have a choice in this matter. My mind is still repelled, but my desire is taking over. Because I have to do it, I find myself trying to be calm as i go through this experience. I tell myself, “It’s okay to wet a diaper on purpose - other people do it all the time,” and I keep on repeating that. I bend down, and drink from the sink until I feel like my head is going to explode. I then get up, shrugging as I see that a bit of my hair has got wet, and then go back down, and drink a little more. My stomach feels dead, and I try just breathing in and out until I have caught my breath. I’ve never drunk that much water in a single sitting in my life before, and I’m not sure that it was a good idea to drink that much now. “Okay,” Rudy says, “now put our legs apart, no, a bit further than that, yeah, and stand in front of the toilet. Just imagine yourself going the normal way, and it should come eventually.”

My body is rejecting the idea of a wet diaper, even though my mind seems to have accepted it. I try to pee, but nothing seems to be coming out. I’m tempted to put my hand down there, if just to make it more like I normally pee, but I decide not to. After what seems like ages (even though after looking at the clock, I know it’s only been thirty seconds, I pee the diaper. It feels warm, and beautiful. I look down, and I see the yellowness spreading. The diaper thickens slightly, and I feel the pee spreading around. It absorbs quite quickly, and I’ve never had a more glorious experience, other than actually wearing a diaper eventually. I find my hand gong down to feel my accident (if it can be called that), and I giggle a little as I feel the softness. I see that Mr Cuddles is disappearing slightly. I sit down on the toilet seat, and I notice that the diaper feels evn better like that. I feel exhilarated, happy and free in a way I’ve never felt before.

I can’t believe I just peed a diaper on purpose. I then say it out loud, to see how it sounds, and because I knew it wouldn’t make a difference - the world was going to change in approximately three seconds according to the bathroom clock. I then yell out the words, and then look at the clock again. 2 seconds left.

I try count them, but, in anticipation, I count too fast, “One Mississippi, Two Mississippi,” and it happens just a little later.

The first change I notice is that the bathroom is now part of my room. I’m standing on some plastic covering that covers the tiled flooring. Where the toilet was, there is now a mini cupboard - well, actually, it’s quite big, but it has to be called mini because it doesn’t touch the ceiling. It looks strong enough and big enough to hold me, and I know without thinking (although the padded surface at the top helps) that it’s a changing table. My changing table. I want to sit up on it now, but I want to keep that excitement for the morning. The clock is still where it was, and so is the sink. The bath is the same, although the one side is yellower than I remember it. Next to the bath, there is a bucket of my old bath toys. As far as I can remember, we gave those to my cousin Riley when I was eight. Seven years later, in a wishworld, they’re here. The tiles that used to be white in the bathroom are now a baby blue, except for the floor, which, through the plastic, still seems to be white. I reach for the light switch that should light the rest of my room, and gasp as I see how cute everything looks. The walls that used to be a dark blue have now gone back to their old colour - yellow. It looks cute to me, although I will miss the blue colour. Where my PlayStation used to be, there is now a counter with all my old favourite toys, and I actually jump up and down as i see my old favourite figurine, a schoolboy I called Andrew. He’s with his girlfriend Anna and, in my mind, I imagine that they are both waving at me, and asking me why it took so long for me to realize I missed them. I feel my diaper getting slightly warmer, and I look down at myself. It feels amazing, but it’s going to take some getting used to. I’m wearing a blue footed sleeper with a teddy bear that looks like Mr Cuddles on the front. The cuteness is out of the world, but I find that irrelevant compared to how comfortable I feel. I thought having a diaper hug you 24/7 would be good enough, but this is an even better experience. I feel younger, and happier. My bed is now a bed-crib like Rudy’s, but instead of having a side without a rail, this one has a rail that goes the whole way round, but in the front, there is a gate-like part that looks big enough to let one person in and out. Me. I walk into the crib, and see Mr Cuddles sitting in the corner. I pick him up, and hug him, and look into those deep black eyes. He’s a brown teddy with a white snout (is that the word?) but the expression in his eyes is just so cute that I couldn’t help falling in love with him. He’s quite small, compared to many of the other teddies, but he’s adorable. Rudy turns the light off, and in the darkness, the yellow walls also look dark, but I can live with it. I notice something glimmering next to my computer, which has the same tower, but has an old screen with lots of primary colours. I decide I will check what it is in the morning. As I put my head on the pillow, I feel something under it, and I pull it out. It’s a picture of me, with my diaper half showing out of my jeans, with a gothy nerdy boy, both smiling wildly. As far as I can tell, it was taken around the same time as my hike with Kevin. But instead, we’re outside the door to a concert, and the words “Justin Bieber: Believe” are written in big writing. My mom is giving me a purple shirt, and the nerd is holding up his. It says, “Beauty and a Beat.” Am I a Justin Bieber fan?

Although I’m very excited and happy, I’m exhausted, and I decide that thinking everything through in the morning is a better plan. I put the picture under my pillow and smile, as I feel the plastic sheet, that I doubt I would be needing - these diapers are thick - and then, without any singing from Rudy (Thank God!) I fall asleep, but, due to the Justin Bieber picture, I am worried about what happened to the hike, and my dreams flow back to my old life, to the morning when we were halfway up the mountain.

[END OF CHAPTER TWO]
[sorry it’s a bit predictable, it will get more interesting soon. I promise]

Re: Starring - first story I’ve ever written - chapter 1 finished

Hm. My mistake then. The wording has always just irritated me and I assumed it to be a grammatical error.

Anyway, I read the second chapter, and a few things stuck out at me. First off, the change in person narrating the story (3rd to 1st) is not commonly done, though I have seen one or two books do it. But in general, you’ll want to keep the perspective the same or risk throwing off your readers a bit.

Second, you switch between present- and past-tense. Not anything that a casual reader would notice, but stories should keep the tense constant.

Here are the lines that I feel could use some work.

“It’s a proper gaming computer, and I have spent many days playing games on it.”
You may want to consider rewording this a bit. It sounds to me like a foreigner is saying it.

“She made her opinion on diapers quite clear. She would never date a diaper boy.”
While it’s conceivable that this conversation did once come up between the two, you never mention it until this point. It leaves me wondering where and when the topic presented itself, and what Taylor and Amber specifically had to say about it.

“It was one of the best experiences of my life, but I still want my new life.”
While I realize what you’re getting at, wording it like this makes me think that he would willingly trade his current, established life just for the purpose of wearing diapers, which seems incredibly selfish and shallow. I would go with something more along the lines of “This doesn’t stop my desire to experience my new life.” This way, he’s not just throwing his old life out the window, just setting it aside for a bit.

“I wonder if a diaper would have walls this color.”
…What? Did you mean to refer to the room he would soon be in as a result of his new life?

“I then notice a two doors…”
Obvious what’s wrong here.

“It’s my bathroom.”
Maybe it’s just me, but this bit seems pretty obvious given the preceding and proceeding information. There’s nothing wrong with it, but the blunt statement just takes away a bit from the moment imo.

“After all, it’s weird enough to want to wear diapers, but to pee in them on purpose, now that was just creepy.”
Seems a bit strange for him to be thinking this given what he just said about the bathroom, unless you’re implying he thinks peeing in diapers by accident is perfectly acceptable. You may want to be a bit more clear here.

“I don’t like what Rudy is saying, but I’m actually a little excited to see what a wet diaper feels like.”
He seems to change his mind awfully quickly. I thought there’d be a bit more of a struggle between the “normal” and “diaper-loving” sides of him.

“I’ve never drak that much water in my life before…”
“Drank” is spelled wrong, and the tense is wrong. It should be present perfect; i.e., “I’ve never drunk.” Also, you may want to specify that he had never drunk that much water “at once.”

" ‘Okay,’ Rudy says, and starts speaking again…"
Very redundant here. If he’s saying it, it’s already obvious that he’s speaking again.

“And it does. I feel my pee coming out, and it feels amazing.”
Again, I feel like you rushed this bit. When Rudy said “it should come eventually,” it led me to believe that his body would try to resist somehow. Also, “amazing” describes nothing to me. It’s a very vague adjective. Had I wrote this part, it would’ve gone something like this:
“I feel the pee rushing into the waiting diaper. The warmth spreads out across my crotch and I feel the padding inflate as it readily absorbs the liquid. It is actually kind of exhilarating, and I put my hand down on the plastic covering to feel what I had just done.”
Not saying it needs to be exactly like that, but you get the idea.

“…but I am certainly no needing a change yet.”
“no” —> “not”

“The clock is still where it was, and as is the sink.”
Remove the word “as.”

“I only notice how comfortable it feels.”

Not sure what you’re getting at here. I think you mean to say that he is ignoring the outfit besides the comfort of it. But if he doesn’t notice anything else about it, it makes me wonder how he knows what it even looks like.

“…gate-like part that looks bug enough…”
bug —> big

“I decide to check what it is in the morning.”
Replace “to” with “I will.”

“I decide to think everything through in the morning.”
Same as above.

“…I fall asleep, dreaming of my old life.”
This is kind of a let-down to me. If he’s dreaming of his old life, that says to me that he’s more focused on that than the life he is currently in. I would have said, “…I fall asleep, dreaming of what the first day in my new life will bring.” This way, you can obviously tell that he is looking forward to his new life, rather than still thinking about his old one.

I know that seems like a lot, but don’t let that discourage you. It really is a good story with a lot of potential. I find myself making predictions about what will happen and thinking about how this all could possibly go wrong, which is a good sign. If I didn’t think it was good, I wouldn’t be wasting my time reading it and trying to help you improve.

Re: Starring - up to Chapter 3

Hi, Thisonecoolguy. Thanks for the criticism. I acknowledge your opinion on changing perspective, but it has been my style of writing for as long as I remember. All my favourite books are also written with this style, so it has entered my subconscious as a way of writing.

At the same time, you will read eventually about Amber’s and Taylor’s discussion, in a similar way to how this has been written. I’m sorry if this is putting any readers off, but I feel that it will give a better understanding of Taylor’s character and background.

CHAPTER THREE

Taylor’s dreams

It’s an icy morning, as Taylor opens his eyes. It is still night, in his wishworld, but his mind is travelling back. The world where his memories are from seems almost ethereal, and unreal. He’s in a sleeping bag, wearing the clothes that he wore the day before: khaki shorts, with a blue top that, in the one corner, has the symbol of the camp that he was now in. He is in a lodging house, a large room that has an almost infinite amount of beds. His feet feel cold, but he knew to expect this. Him, and six other boys were halfway up the mountain.

“Morning, sleepy head. Took you long enough,” says a brown haired boy, sitting in the bed next to him, his stuff already packed, and on the go. Kevin is wearing a Nirvana top, which Taylor doesn’t really understand, but he shrugs it off. His legs are still sore from the walking they did yesterday, and he wasn’t sure that he wanted to continue with the hike.

“M…M…Morning,” Taylor says, trying to sleep, but still very drowsy, “What time is it?” His back feels out of joint, but he realises that if he says anything, he will be called a sissy. He stretches, and then kicks the sleeping bag off, and it lands on the floor without any sound. He shivers, and reaches straight away into his rucksack, getting out some jeans.

“Oh, it’s ten to six. Remember, you said you wanted to go jogging.” Kevin says, looking away as Taylor changes into the jeans. Taylor decides to keep the same top, after all, it wasn’t like it was that dirty.

“Oh, yeah,” Taylor mumbles. He bends down to reach his shoes, eyes half-open, and almost trips, which Kevin laughs at.

“It’s not funny,” Taylor grumbles, and opens his eyes properly to put his black and green takkies (sorry, it’s a South-Africanism, I don’t know what they’re called in other parts of the world - I think you might call them sneakers, I don’t know) on. They were Nike’s, but so old that you could barely see the ticks on either side.

“Yeah, dude, when are you getting new ones, those are ancient.” Kevin smirks

“They get the job done, ok.”

Taylor enjoys jogging. It’s his way of doing exercise, and gives him a sense of purpose. He likes the feeling of power he gets when he runs that final mile, and the way that the wind blows behind him. It’s the closest feeling that there is, in his mind, to flying. But, that morning, Taylor was not feeling motivated. Unfortunately, he’d promised Kevin that they would run, and he wasn’t one to break a promise.

Taylor, now dressed, goes to the bathroom, to take a tinkle, and laughs as he sees the way his hair is sticking up. He’s not really fazed about how he looks, but he feels that he should at least be fairly presentable, and so he combs his hair down, and keeps on getting annoyed as a piece at the back just refuses to be seated. He doesn’t like it when his hair sticks up. He eventually decides to move on, though, after all, Kevin is waiting, but before he does, he looks in the mirror one last time. It’s a really bad mirror, dirty, and you had to actually squint your eyes in order to see properly, but, in the mirror, he sees Rudy too.

Rudy speaks, but his voice doesn’t sound the same, it’s slower and much older. “Taylor, every night, you will have a memory dream. However, something will change in the memory; something has to, in order for you to wake up in the wishworld. But, when you do wake, it will no longer be a memory of your past, but merely a dream. And, as is the nature of dreams, by the next day, you will have forgotten 95 percent of what happened. Sorry, but I needed to let you know, and it’s the way it has to be. Enjoy your hike, though.”

Taylor looks around the bathroom, in shock. He was going to forgotten the hike, the most awesome experience he’d ever had, other than wearing diapers. Well, that was a blow. Unless, he changed something in this memory, then he would wake up, and he would forget the start, but remember the rest. He finds his head looking down at a puddle on the floor. He doesn’t know whether it’s pee, or water, but he doesn’t want to find out, but as he looks, Rudy appears in the puddle, and whispers something. He has to go closer to the puddle, and he finds out, due to the smell, that it’s pee.

“A change you make won’t do a thing; the change will come on its own. And it will have something to do with your own life. Don’t worry, though, it’s not like it’s going to change much for you – it’ll just remove your memories, and if you were a diaper boy, you wouldn’t have these memories any way. Bye.”

Kevin enters the bathroom, wanting to ask Taylor to hurry up, and is surprised to see Taylor sniffing a puddle of pee.

“Taylor, are – are you, ah, sniffing a puddle of pee?”

“It’s not what it looks like, I promise.”

“If you say so,” Kevin says with a high voice.

“It’s not!”

“Ok, let’s just run, now, ok?”

They walk outside, and shiver as the cold winter air hits them. They’re quite high up on the mountain, and the wind is howling desperately. Taylor decides to check if Rudy is right, and, just for the hell of it, decides to change something, so instead of running the way they ran the first time he was here, he decided to run in the opposite direction. It was harder to do, as the wind was pushing them back, and Kevin asked for than a few times if they could run in the opposite direction, but they eventually finished their half hour run. Taylor’s feet were pounding, the sandy floor and the rocks in various places had done a good number to his feet, and so he hat to sit for five minutes, to catch his breath, and so that his feet weren’t burning.

As he was sitting on a bench outside, his feet lifted so that they weren’t touching anything, so that they would heal faster, a boy came out. He was wearing a red top with the words “I’m forgiving what I’ve done…” – the lyrics of Taylor’s favourite Linkin Park song.

“Morning,” he says to the boy. Taylor realises with a jolt that he needs to get ready to go on the hike, and pack his stuff up, but when he goes inside, he can’t find his bag.

He asks the boy who just outside if he’d seen his bag anywhere, and is told, “I think I saw that other guy, the guy with black hair wearing the blue top, a, slept on the bed next to you yesterday. I saw him take it. It looked like he was walking down the mountain. He went out the back way. Sorry I didn’t stop him.”

“Nah, it’s cool,” Taylor says, and then realises with a jolt that this guy he was talking to here was the guy he was at the Justin Bieber concert with. He was the gothy nerd. He needed to know a bit more about him, after all, it looked like they were friends in the wishworld. The easiest place to start was with a name, and so Taylor says, “Hey, dude,” as he walks down the path in the front of the cabin," what’s your name?"

“Zack,” the goth says, “Yours?”

“Taylor. Pleased to meet you,” he says as he runs down the mountain. He’s forgotten that Kevin likes pranks, and he would probably want to get Taylor back for the route they ran. He sees Kevin standing next to a dustbin reasonably nearby, and goes and talks to him.

“Can I have my backpack back?”

"Sure. It’s in the bin. Fish it out, or hike without it, your choice. Sorry, it was too good an opportunity to pass down.

“Seriously, Kevin?”

“Yep,” Kevin replies, and then goes up to the cabin again, giggling. He shouts back to Taylor, “Oh, and we’re leaving in 5 minutes, so be quick about it.”

Taylor opens the bin, and is surprised to find the smell of pee in the bin. Thankfully, the bin is reasonably small, and Taylor soon has his bag out. And then he realises where the smell is coming form. It looked like Kevin had put the bag in a puddle of pee before putting it in the bin. This is most certainly not something that happened last time I was here, Taylor thinks, Surely this is a big enough change, but the dream was still continuing.

Taylor puts the bag on his back, but makes sure that the pee doesn’t touch him. He runs to catch up with the others who had already began the hike, and decides to walk with Kevin, wanting him to explain this.

“Oh, what’s that strange smell? Taylor’s eventually arrived, I see,” Kevin says as Taylor walks with him. Kevin ignores Taylor after the first comment, and talks to another of their friends: Anthony.

Taylor starts getting angry, but tries to keep himself calm, and asks Kevin, “Why?”

“well, based on earlier, it looks like you like the smell of pee. And, well, it’s tradition to prank someone on camp, and, well, Zacky’s been pranked a little too many times, so I thought we’d switch it up a little.”

“Wow. To think you would stoop that low. I thought I was your best friend, dude.”

“You are, but I thought it would just be something fun to try.”

“Fun! You think soaking someone’s bag with pee is fun! No, dude, that’s just going over the top.”

Taylor then walks away from them, wanting to have the last word, and decides to walk with Zack, who was right at the back, walking alone.

“They’re real dicks, aren’t they,” Zack says as he sees the pee on Taylor’s bag.

“Yeah, I suppose.”

Taylor spends the rest of the hike with Zack, who is actually quite cool, except for being over passionate about music and acting. Taylor also finds it quite odd that Zack didn’t seem at all disgusted by the smell coming from his bag.

They eventually arrived at the top of that mountain at around 6:30 that evening. After dinner, which is a poorly cooked macaroni cheese heated in a bad microwave, the boys hang out at the back of the dorm. Taylor is sitting on a ledge, his shoulders humped as he thinks of the way Kevin treated him earlier. He’s like to be friends with Kevin, but he knew that he would have to apologize for what happened earlier, and he wasn’t sure that he wanted to do that. He’d taken a shower, and washed the bag, but due to a lack of soap, he still smells like pee.

“You OK, there?” Zack asks. Zack had been singing away with his phone right to his ear, and had only just finished the song. The lyrics were, “Because these things will change, can you feel it now, these walls that they put up to hold us back fell down, it’s a revolution, the time will come for us to finally win…,” but Zack is no longer concerned about the song, but is worried about Taylor’s welfare. Taylor seems depressed, and Zack realises that he is the only one that could help.

Taylor seems different somehow, though.

“Yeah. I’m just sad that I’m no longer part of that group.”

“I’m sue you are. You just had an off day. It’ll all be okay tomorrow.”

“I hope so.”

It starts to get dark, and soon everyone goes inside the cabin. As soon as everyone is in, and the door is closed, Kevin comes up to Taylor.

“If you want to be part of our group again, you have to tell us some stuff. Anthony, David and I have some questions for you, and you have to answer them as truthfully as you can. In fact, you have to promise us you will. You’ve never broken a promise, have you, Tay Tay?”

Taylor is willing to do anything so that he could be a part of that group again, and so he quickly promises. The dream is so vivid that he is actually unable to realise it is just that: a dream.

“Awesome” Kevin says, sitting down on Taylor’s bed where Taylor was already seated, “so, why don’t you tell everyone why you were smelling a puddle of pee this morning?”

“I thought I saw something in it, but my eyes were playing tricks on me. That’s why I was on the bathroom floor.” It wasn’t a lie, technically. Rudy was in the puddle, but he couldn’t really have been, and so it must have been an illusion.

“Somehow I don’t believe you. Anyway, it’s your turn now, Ant.”

“Taylor, you’ve always been so perfect, so sure of yourself, and so I want some dirt on you - something not so amazing, and so I want you to tell this whole room your most embarrassing secret.”

The first thing that pops into Taylor’s mind is his poopy accident in grade 1,but before he could start talking about that, the words, “I’m a diaper lover,” come out of his mouth. I mean, like, I like wearing diapers and acting like a baby."

With that, everyone starts laughing, except Zack, who is surprised, but isn’t openly mocking him.

Taylor continues speaking, but without control.

“In fact, I’m wearing one now.” He pulls down his jeans and reveals a very wet diaper, ad the diaper starts getting even wetter until a yellow streak is falling to the floor, and is being stopped by his half pulled down jeans. The diaper continues leaking until the pee goes past his jeans and makes a tiny puddle of pee around him.

Taylor looks down at the puddle in shame, horror and surprise, and, as he does, he hears his mother’s voice saying, “Justin, please go and check TJ’s diaper,” and wakes up groggily.

END OF CHAPTER THREE

Re: Starring - first story I’ve ever written

I think that when you title a thread “first story I’ve ever written” you (or anyone in that position) do yourself a tremendous disservice. Its not Dickens or anything but I’ve certainly read worse and I’m sure so have others here.

You do a great job of communicating just how random a dream can be sometimes and it was a nice touch to make it as ambivalent as possible about WHEN he is actually dreaming. Thats actually a really interesting element sort of just taking Taylors word for it like an ABDL Inception crossover.