I’ve tried reading two of these stories. “Aunt Mirah” was the first one. Its was pretty cliche and didn’t really come across as believable. There were many scenes that in reality would of been considered child abuse, which was clearly seen by outside spectators. This might of been completely acceptable had there been some back story as to how this had become acceptable to the public. It also didn’t really get much into internal dialog. On top of that this story doesn’t have an end.
The second I tried to read was “Danielle Diapered In Jail”. This story had a few grammatical errors but nothing to terrible or constant. This story could have been ok, if it wasn’t for how little this person knows about jail. First of all, jail is where someone stays before they are placed in their residing prison. Its like a holding area till you are charged and given the terms of your punishment. On top of that it doesn’t ever explain what she did to receive such a terrible sentence. At 15 years old and having a 5 year prison sentence as your punishment she would have to of done something pretty bad. However the way she behaves with authortive figures and her ability to consider the right choice, leads you to believe she is incapable of ever doing anything close to receiving this sort of sentence. On top of that the routine they display for juvinilles is completely inaccurate. I tried to pretend that this is set in a different dimension though where these sort of things could be possible. I was beginning to get into the story the farther the story processed. I was starting to even sorta enjoy it. However just like “Aunt Mirah” this one has no ending. I don’t even think you could say it has a middle
[QUOTE=LilPeaches;71466]I’ve tried reading two of these stories. “Aunt Mirah” was the first one. Its was pretty cliche and didn’t really come across as believable. There were many scenes that in reality would of been considered child abuse, which was clearly seen by outside spectators. This might of been completely acceptable had there been some back story as to how this had become acceptable to the public. It also didn’t really get much into internal dialog. On top of that this story doesn’t have an end.
The second I tried to read was “Danielle Diapered In Jail”. This story had a few grammatical errors but nothing to terrible or constant. This story could have been ok, if it wasn’t for how little this person knows about jail. First of all, jail is where someone stays before they are placed in their residing prison. Its like a holding area till you are charged and given the terms of your punishment. On top of that it doesn’t ever explain what she did to receive such a terrible sentence. At 15 years old and having a 5 year prison sentence as your punishment she would have to of done something pretty bad. However the way she behaves with authortive figures and her ability to consider the right choice, leads you to believe she is incapable of ever doing anything close to receiving this sort of sentence. On top of that the routine they display for juvinilles is completely inaccurate. I tried to pretend that this is set in a different dimension though where these sort of things could be possible. I was beginning to get into the story the farther the story processed. I was starting to even sorta enjoy it. However just like “Aunt Mirah” this one has no ending. I don’t even think you could say it has a middle[/QUOTE]
Yeah, not all of the stories hold believable elements. Others do.
I read “In for a Penni” about a month ago. It was sooooo good!! Very imaginative. Great build up. Not to mention it pretty original. Its written in a way that’s pretty easy to follow. Its a great suggestion
Just finished “My Real Country Family”. I liked it quite a bit. It was an interesting theme. Loved the weird drama thoughout. The characters in this story blossom fully. The ending was pretty much how I wanted it to go. I agree, its definitely a good suggestion.
I just finished “Lily the Liar”. Omg it was amazing. Its in my top 5 and will definitely be reading it again. The writer that wrote this is truly gifted at writing these stories. The story is probably the longest one I’ve read so far. It never felt like it was just dragging on. The story starts off so interesting that it grabbed my attention right away. Thank you for showing this story. Its kinda hard sometimes to find good ones and this one is better than good.
Seeing as you enjoyed those three stories so much and had such praise for them, I hope you said so in the comments for those stories. I’m sure the authors would appreciate that. After all, they’d probably notice your kind words more easily if they were in the comments to the story rather than hidden away in a separate section of the board.
