Hello everybody, here’s the first prologue and first chapter of my story “Of Infantile Habits: Richie’s Memories”. Hope you enjoy it! Ideas and criticism are welcome!
Hello everybody, my name is Richie. Do not ever call me Ricardo, I hate it, I don’t know why my parents decided it was a good name for me. But I like Richie, sounds little. And I like it if my name sounds little, and I’ll tell you why in just a second. Where was I? Oh yes, I’m seventeen years old, redhead, green eyes, not into drugs or smoking or even drinking. Yeah, you might say I’m an old goody-two shoes. I just don’t like my body filling with the wrong substances. Blame me for wanting to be healthy! But yeah, I don’t have any addictions. Scratch that, I do. If you can call that an addiction. It’s not, don’t think I’m addicted! Ok, you don’t even know what I’m talking about.
You see, there are many people in the world who likes doing certain things, right? Yes, like, drinking for relaxing or smoking. Well, as I might have mentioned before, I don’t do any of that. But there is something I like that I actually think that you might find interesting: I’m an Infantilist. Yeah, right…you might be wondering what the heck is that. The thing is…I can’t believe I’m going to say it, but he’re I go.
I like to be babied, I like to wear and…erm…use diapers…
Don’t think I’m a pervert, OK?! It’s actually something pretty common. I mean, no that common but not that uncommon. Damn it, you’re thinking I’m a pedophile, aren’t you? Well, let me educate you a bit with the following points (I’m not a teacher but I WILL clarify things):
Number one: We’re not perverts! Actually, it’s been proven that most Infantilists are innocent souls who like to protect children from harm. So, we’re super-heroes! Well, just without the superpowers. Anyway, we’re sensitive and human; there is nothing wrong with that. We just like diapers and be treated like babies.
Number two: It’s not something we want to do all time! (Though some extremists will say so). We just indulge in these activities to relax and feel secure, so don’t start thinking we’re not grown up people too, because MOST of us are. Most of us enjoy having a regular, normal, grown up life. We just need some release. I bet you’re thinking, “for release, a good drink is enough.” Well, mind you, I enjoy wetting diapers instead. Any problem? No? Thanks.
Number three: We’re more than you think. It is not that rare actually, so don’t think I’m the only one. Actually it is said that around 1 amongst 1000 is an Infantilist. I know, not a lot, not a few. Most of us are men, but guess what, there is still a diverse group. But I’m one of them, so get over it. I’m still awesome.
Truth is, we’re all awesome. We’re all special, and unique. It’s just that some people tend to forget that. Most people actually, there is intolerance everywhere, even at home (in my case), but…nevertheless, there are also amazing people who are open to these kinds of things and I’m grateful I have friends like that. They remind me that I am, indeed, awesome…
But, it was not always like this. In the past, I had darkness and fears and sadness. I can tell, but I’m still afraid of opening my heart. I’m still afraid of letting go. So my message to you is to never let go of yourself, to always fight for what is right and to STAY TRUE TO YOURSELF! Dare to shine!
Shall I tell you my story? I bet you’d like to hear it.
I was playing videogames with my twin brother. Henry and I were close, pretty close. I mean, who is not close when it comes to have a twin? Well, I’ve heard of evil twins and such, but trust me; my bond with my brother is unbreakable. Or at least that is what I want to believe. I’d do anything for him and he for me, I’d like to think. Of course we fight and such, but we get along pretty well most of the time.
We are alike in every sense, we’re clones. And that’s what my best friend, Phillip, calls us… clones. Henry is a brunette and I’m redhead, that’s our only difference. But we’re pretty much the same. We both have sparkling green eyes and well, we’re good looking. Although our younger sister of fourteen, Larisa, doesn’t think that. Anyway, as I was saying.
Henry was pressing the buttons madly, concentrated. “I think I’m going to defeat you for fifth time in a row, little brother.”
“Naw, I don’t think…” I began as I pressed the buttons on the controller but he delivered the final blow. “…so…”
My brother smirked at me with a mischievous smile. “Face it, Richie. You’re either born with the Gamer’s Touch or you aren’t.”
I sighed. “Yeah, whatever…”
Henry patted my back, still with that mischievous smirk on his face. “So, another duel?”
“Forget it!” I said, frustrated. “For another defeat? No thanks. Why don’t we…”
Suddenly we were interrupted by Larisa, who banged in into our room. Henry and I were sixteen and we still shared a room, call it separation anxiety. Anyway, Lari looked at us and rolled her eyes. “You guys were still playing that thing?”
“Do you have a problem with that, darling little sister?” Henry asked with a grin. “Just kicking your brother’s butt makes me feel better of anything.”
“Well, Mom is waiting for you downstairs, we’re going to meet with Aunt Patricia, so you’d better get going,” said Larisa and left us alone to get ready.
Henry sighed. “You’ve heard the lady, we have to get going.”
Without saying anything else, he stepped into the bathroom to get ready. I looked at him as he closed the door. I was glad the cyber-beating was over but still, I was thinking on many things. I felt urges I could not control.
I was going to be honest. I haven’t felt really well lately, though I’ve hid it very well. You know what it feels like to feel repressed, right? Well, it’s the same for me and my infantilism, I have to hide it from the world because it’s not something socially accepted. I know, I should feel free. But for a paraphilic infantilist, it ain’t so easy.
Making sure he wasn’t looking, I started sucking my thumb. I’ve always have done that, and probably always will. My family thinks I stopped when I was thirteen but I continued. I could not stop no matter how hard I tried. It’s not something bad, well, except for the buck teeth but who cares?
I closed my eyes and suckled my thumb, feeling bliss. Yes, that’s what I felt.
Suddenly, before I realized, Henry had gone out of the bathroom and was staring at me. “You still do that?”
Blinking, I put my thumb out of my mouth and blushed. “It’s not what you think, I’m just…”
“A little thumb sucking baby?” said Henry with a smirk. “Does little Richie wants his pacifier?”
Unknown to him, what he was saying was making me feel aroused. I was still blushing and trying to control my breathing. “Henry, I…”
“Don’t worry, baby bro,” said my brother and smiled at me, patting my back. “You’re secret is safe with me.”
I sighed in relief, still feeling strange by his comment. “Thanks, bro. If our parents find out, they will bug me again and embarrass me.”
“I know, don’t worry,” said Henry and walked to the door. “Coming?”
Looking at him, I shook my head. “I’m not going; tell Mom and Dad I’m not feeling well. I’m not in the mood for family reunions right now.”
“Suit yourself,” said Henry and moved aside, walking towards the door. He knew sometimes I had antisocial tendencies, but that was just me.
He left, and soon enough I stayed looking at the door. I was feeling really anxious, REALLY anxious for them to leave. Finally I heard the car being started and I ran towards the window, seeing them gone. I rushed towards my hiding place, a gap between the last drawers of my closet.
I removed the drawer and saw what was underneath: my stash of diapers. They were baby diapers, but they were better than nothing. For me, they were more than enough. I rushed to my bed and removed my pants and my underwear. I was feeling ecstasy. I had to find moment for myself to wear diapers, and today was the perfect day.
I put the diaper on my bed and laid in top of it, bringing the front to my…front. I taped the tapes and smiled as I felt it. They were two baby’s diapers taped so it was big enough to fit me. I closed my eyes and relaxed. I slipped my thumb into my mouth and enjoyed the feeling of the snug diaper against my butt and my thumb inside my mouth.
With a smirk, I closed my eyes and let my bladder release. I’ve been holding it all day just to have a good wetting, and despite the diaper being small, and probably leaking, I was enjoying the smell of babyness in me.
Gosh, I love being an infantilist.