Of Infantile Habits (Chapter 2 Up)

Hello guys! So, I’ve been a long time lurker of this site, but I love a lot of the stories found here. They are more than just diaper stories, they have full plot and stuff worthy of someone’s time. So, I am a published writer by some major publishing houses, but I’m also an ABDL so I decided to write my first ABDL story, see if it get’s anywhere. I would love your comments and reviews! My plan is to post a chapter or two every week.

I will add a synopsis later on as the story starts shaping itself.

Have a wonderful 2017!

BTW: I’m looking for a proofreader, if someone wants to chip in, by all means, contact me!

Of Infantile Habits
Alex Lira


It all starts when you’re very young.

You don’t understand, you try to but you’re just drawn. When you’re a child, you look around and see all the children playing to be superheroes. You see them playing with cars, riding their bikes and running around. But you’re different and you don’t understand why. Instead of wanting to play to be a superhero, a racecar rider or a firemen, you look for something else. A inviting temptation you can’t understand.

And then you see them, the babies. They’re in their mothers’ arms, or in their father’s lap. They’re playing with toys, baby toys. You look around and even though you’re just seven years old, you try to understand. Why do you feel so drawn to the way babies are treated? You see mothers bottle feeding them, toddlers sucking their pacifiers or their thumbs. And you don’t understand but you want to be one of them.

But then you stare at the other children and you realize you want to be like them. But you can’t, because there is something strange going on with them.

You realize you are staring at the babies’ diapers, and you can’t control yourself. You look at yourself and you realize you want to be diapered too. You want to be cuddled too. You want to be taken care of.

And then comes dad, who tells you how proud he is you’re growing up, and you feel guilty. Guilty of wanting to be a baby. Because everybody is expecting you grow up. Everybody is happy to know you’re a healthy seven year old starting grade school, but you don’t feel that way. You feel different, you feel wrong.

You feel you’re not up to their expectations. You feel little. You look at your brothers, or your sisters, and they’re normal. They are normal. You’re not. You’re seven year old and you want to be babied. Something must be wrong with you, right? Why can’t you feel normal like they are? And then you’re wondering why it is so wrong.

Because people don’t understand, and you don’t understand.

And yet… you can’t change who you are inside.

Chapter One

Michael Logan was a normal thirteen year old, he was one of a kind. A+ student, he was even invited to go to the most prestigious schools. He was very good looking, and many girls were looking to go out with him. Even though they were just thirteen year olds, the idea of dating burned in the mind as the hormones of those teenagers got awry. There was a girl named Rachel who wanted to kiss him badly, and she publicly displayed that desire.

Michael was in the soccer team, so it was obvious she would feel very interested in the most popular guy at school. But Michael wasn’t interested. Not because she wasn’t pretty, she was pretty. But Michael had other things in mind. Michael had decided that he wanted to focus on his studies and try to avoid girls as much as possible. Yes, he was irresistible, with that brunette hair and green eyes, he was candy for the eyes.

But the boy harbored a secret, and he felt terrible about it.

As the class ended, Michael stepped up, he had a nervousness inside of him. It was the best time of the day. The end of classes and he didn’t have soccer practice, so he had the whole evening to himself since his parents were in a meeting with his younger brother, Jason. Michael said goodbye to his friends and walked out of the school building, feeling his heart pounding.

Michael’s parents were both working people, his father was a business entrepreneur and his mother was a school teacher and they were pretty successful. Jason was eleven, just two years younger than Michael. They got along pretty well, but boys were boys and sometimes fights would break out. But all in all, he thought his family was alright. As much as a thirteen year old thought family was cool.
As the young boy, barely a teenager, walked home, he stopped at the local market. He entered, greeted by the sound of the beeping machines as the clerks marked the product in their system. Michael felt really stupid for a moment, for what he was about to do was unthinkable for a thirteen year old.

He was going to buy diapers.

Michael didn’t understand, but ever since he was a little kid, probably five, he fantasized about being a baby again. He didn’t want to be a baby all the time, he felt stupid and wrong. But in the past years, he would discover many things about the world and about himself. He realized that he couldn’t stop it. Every time he saw a baby getting its diaper changed or being bottle-fed, he felt the burning desire to be like that.

And he felt terribly guilty. But at the same time, he could feel his world changing. He was growing up, and many changes came with teenage. He realized he couldn’t hide forever, so he looked on the internet for people who could help him. One day, he found out more than he would imagine. He found out that he wasn’t the only one.

There was a whole community of people who liked to wear diapers and be babies. They called themselves Adult Babies, Teen Babies, and Diaper Lovers. Thanks to the world of connection and online support, Michael realized he was not that bad. There were many, many people who shared his interest. And none of them could explain why they felt that way, they just did.

Michael’s heart was pounding with nervousness, because he had reached the baby aisles.

After so many heart-wrenching moments, Michael decided that he was not going to let his infantilism (the technical term) deter him from being happy. So he was going to embrace that side of him, even if it had to be in the privacy of his room. He had started accounts on social media to meet other people online. Some were pretty weird, but others were really nice and understanding. They were amazing, and they supported him.

So Michael looked around and found a teddy bear. He looked at it, and it was inviting him to hold him. Michael’s heart was racing. Michael’s hands were sweating. There was something about that teddy bear that was calling out for him. So he grabbed it and looked at it. He had spent the whole summer washing cars and cutting grass to save for this. He couldn’t back down.

He couldn’t.

While putting the teddy bear around him, he walked to the next aisle to find what he was initially looking for: pacifiers and diapers. He really didn’t know which one he should take, they were all very pretty. He knew he couldn’t fit in baby diapers, so he chose the big boy pull-up and some adult diapers. He had money for both bags.

Heart racing, again.

So he had the most important item in his arms, there was just one thing missing, the cherry of the cake: a pacifier.

He looked around, and found the perfect baby blue pacifier. It was the biggest size so he thought it would be good for him.

With the three items on his hands, he walked towards the register to buy his items. Michael was really nervous, afraid someone would see him, afraid someone would realize he was buying all that stuff for himself.

Michael finally reached the counter, and the clerk lady looked at him curiously, but said nothing as he finally paid for everything he’d bought.


He froze.

He turned around, and saw one of his school friends, Damian, stare at him with curiosity, however with a smile on his face.

Michael tried to hide his stuff. “Oh, hi Damian.”

“Fancy seeing you here,” said Damian as he approached him, he was carrying a bag of junk food, and some sodas. “Do you live close? I’ve never seen you around…”

Michael didn’t know what to say.

Damian’s eyes darted towards Michael’s bag, and unfortunately, the diapers could be clearly seen, as well as the plushy and the pacifier. “I didn’t know you had a baby sibling…”

Michael found his mouth dry. “Oh, yeah, a baby sibling. Yeah, it’s… my cousin, actually…I…”

“Those pull-ups are large size,” said Damian and looked at him confused. “How old is he?”

Michael stopped and took a deep breath. “I have to get home, Damian. I… I’m running late. Catch up with you later?”

Damian was surprised by Michael’s cutting behavior, but he nodded and smiled at him, patting him in the shoulder. “It’s alright, Mike, see you later then.”

Michael took a deep breath and walked out of the store, feeling like he was going to pass out of nervousness. He had tried so much to hide it, but he was a lousy actor. Anyhow, he walked home, thinking. I hope he doesn’t mention this to anyone, I’m a lousy liar.

However, he relaxed after a while. After all, why would Damian tell anyone something as insignificant as this? It was just his paranoia.

Michael walked home, relieved to find it empty. He knew his parents would probably be out all day and Jason was in detention for the afternoon. His little brother just couldn’t stay out of trouble.

The teenager rushed to his room, which was full of posters of his favorite superheroes, although he was seriously thinking on redecorating to put up some rock bands’ poster’s he liked. He was once again trembling, out of excitement and adrenaline.

He quickly opened the bag of adult diapers, and stared at them. He had never seen an adult diaper before, so he couldn’t believe it. They were huge, they would totally fit him. Michael then unbuckled his belt and removed his pants, his hands sweating again. He was going to wear a diaper for the first time since he was a baby.

With only his boxers, he rushed towards his parents’ bathroom and grabbed baby powder they used for prickly heat. He rushed back to his room and then he flopped down on the bed. He removed his boxer shorts, and his t-shirt. He was left in nothing, he was stark naked. He felt ridiculous but he was so anxious.

Then, he laid his lower half upon the diaper and started to powder his thighs and private parts. He felt elated as the scent of baby powder reached his nose. Michael knew he wanted to smell that forever.

Finally, he put the diaper upon his crotch and taped it. One tape first, then the second, then third and finally the fourth. He sat up, the diaper was so comfortable. He felt comfortable. It was so thick and plastic backed and he couldn’t help but giggle like a baby as he tried to close his legs and find it impossible.

He jumped out of bed and found himself toddling towards the mirror, where he stared at himself. He looked like an oversized baby, and he adored it. Wearing diapers felt much better than he imagined. He had been told in the forums how good it felt, but right now, he couldn’t put in words how amazing it felt.

He admired his padded butt for a few minutes, and his smile was wider than ever.

Finally he opened the package of the pacifier and stared at it for a minute, he realized he was hypnotically staring at it. He popped it in his mouth and then he started sucking. At first it felt foreign, but then he realized he was in love with the feeling. He already sucked his thumb in secret, so sucking a pacifier felt nothing strange now that he thought about it. It felt just as good.

He found himself sucking rhythmically.

Michael grabbed his new teddy bear and hugged it, sucking his pacifier and crawling into bed. He wanted to feel like that forever, but he knew he couldn’t. He had to grow up, and he was okay with that. But for a minute, he wanted to relish on the fact that he was a big baby. He enjoyed being a big baby.

He set his phone’s alarm to sound within the next hour, and then he put the covers over himself.

Hugging his teddy bear, who he decided to call Jimmy, as he sucked his pacifier and drifted to sleep.

For the first time in years, he slept like a baby.

One hour later, he woke up.

He had to pee.

Michael stared at the ceiling for a moment, realizing he was sucking on a pacifier and hugging Jimmy tightly against his chest. He realized he was wearing a diaper, and for a moment he felt ridiculous. But it was the first time he had indulged in his baby desires, and it was the first time he had actually worn a diaper. And it felt so good.

He decided he had to wet it. It was not a choice. He had to. He felt inclined to. It took some time and effort to relax his bladder, but finally, he let loose and felt the warm tingling sensation engulf his crotch and butt and thighs. He felt amazing. And then the smell of pee reached him, and he realized it wasn’t so bad.

Michael was a baby inside, and being a baby by himself for the first time was amazing.

He looked at the time, and he realized his family might arrive any minute now. He sighed, he had to change and he didn’t want to. He wanted to enjoy his wet diaper a little more. He squished his legs, feeling the warmth and sighed, getting the pacifier out of his mouth.

He toddled out of his bed, refreshed after his nap, and finally put everything away. He hid Jimmy, the pacifier and the bag of diapers and pull-ups. Now all he had to do was change and put on some clothes.

Relishing on the baby-ness of the diaper, he sighed and ripped the tapes and cleaned himself with some wet toilet paper. Then he put his clothes back on.

He put the diaper in a garbage bag and disposed of it in the street’s garbage can, just in time to see his parents’ car park.

His mother, Malia, and his father, Robert, pulled out of the car. Jason opened the back door and stepped out of the vehicle.

“Hey mom, hey dad, hey rat.”

Jason rolled his eyes. “What’s up rat?”

“How was detention?” asked Michael with a smile.

“Boring,” said Jason, and then he looked at his older brother. “Wanna play some videogames with me?”


He kissed his mother and father in the cheek, Michael was always very affectionate. They greeted him back the same way and the Logan family stepped inside, ready to spend some time together after a busy day.

“So, how was your day?” asked Malia, the brunette haired woman, young and wise and full of love. “Did you do something special?”

Michael lied. “Nope, nothing special at all.”

Re: Of Infantile Habits

You should add an extra space between the paragraphs (it’s not a particularly bad wall of text -in part due to the use of tabbing- but it’s an unnecessary obstacle to reading). And get rid of the unused BBCode closing tags.

I don’t have time to really read the story itself today, I’ll get back to you on the story content.

Re: Of Infantile Habits

I’m gonna come right out and say that you hit a really strong note with the prologue. I can relate very closely to what you described.

But you almost lost me completely with the very next sentence.

Michael Logan was a normal thirteen year old, he was one of a kind.

Not only is it possibly the most cliched opening for this type of story, but it’s almost contradictory within itself.
Yes I understand that ‘normal thirteen year-old’ and ‘one of a kind’ are technically accurate for humans. But for what you’re trying to convey, it doesn’t come across well at all.

Next, you proceeded with an info dump about the MC, followed by even more cliches. Perhaps I’ve read all the wrong ABDL stories, but what you’ve covered - ‘nervously buying diapers,’ ‘nearly being caught by a friend,’ and ‘alone at home with diapers’ are exceedingly common. Now granted, they’re common because these scenes are probably what most ABDL’s go through during childhood. But the cliche isn’t the problem, it’s how you’ve handled it. Most things that happen in your story are just plainly described. ‘He did this,’ ‘he felt that,’ etc. I hate to say it’s bland, because there’s enough variety in how you’ve written it that it doesn’t become repetitive, but it just doesn’t stand out.

There’s nothing particularly compelling about any of it. Even some of this interest’s best stories cover the exact same ground, but there’s usually a twist. I’m not demanding a twist though. But there has to be something that makes me not question whether I’ve read this elsewhere. There’s nothing wrong with a common scene, as long as it’s handled well.

Sweet Desires (unfinished) covers some similar ground, but really gets into the MCs head. The focus is not simply on telling us what happened, but showing all the little bits that make those events significant.

I don’t want to come across as totally bashing what you’ve done. But if you’re a published writer, I’d hope you’d want to stand out instead of retreading familiar ground. Again, there’s nothing wrong with a familiar concept, but I think there ought to be something to spice it up. Of course, you’ve only got one chapter up so it could go anywhere from here.

I’ll end on a lighter note by saying that of all things, proofreading is a strong suit. It’s not perfect, but there are no glaring flaws in the grammar department.

I’d really like someone else to comment on this; I’m having a tough time articulating exactly what it is that’s wrong. Also, after having typed all of this up, I realize that it probably comes across as really harsh; sorry. I’ve been told I need to put in more smileys, but I forgot. :stuck_out_tongue: (there’s one at least.) Anyway, I wanna provide feedback; I wanna help.

Maybe it’s just me, but even after a very relate-able prologue, the rest of it didn’t really grab my attention. :-\
Sorry if that sounds as mean to you as it does to me, it isn’t intended to be mean.

Anyway, I’m tired right now, so I currently suck horribly at providing usable feedback. Let’s hope someone else will respond and not ramble on like I have.

Re: Of Infantile Habits

Seconded. It’s well written but the content is very paint-by-numbers. If it’s someone’s first ABDL story then it’s a great place to start but there’s nothing here for someone who’s been reading these for years.

Re: Of Infantile Habits

I like where this is going maybe in later chapters Mike can come to his mommy and ask for a change

Re: Of Infantile Habits (Chapter 2 Up)

Hello guys.

Now, I’ve received numerous reviews on the story and I must say I’m delighted. I was specially happy with Vearynope’s review, because it was constructive and it will help me improve the story. So thank you, you too, TheOneWhoSees. Anyway, here is the second chapter.

Chapter Two

“It’s wrong.”

Adrian Hale murmured to himself, feeling self-loath and hate towards himself. How was he supposed to explain to his parents that he liked to wear diapers? He hated himself. Hated, hated, hated. He wanted to wear a diaper and have someone tell him it was okay, but he knew it was depraved and perverted and wrong. He looked at the cross his mother kept by the door and felt guilty.

God was probably angry at him, probably hated him.

Right now, he hated himself too.

And for a fifteen year old to hate himself, it was pretty strong. Adrian had looked in the internet for help, to see if there was a cure, and sadly enough, much to his own self-loathing, he discovered that Paraphilic Infantilism and Diaper Fetishism was pretty hard to cure, he knew it was impossible. He was doomed to be suffering from this condition forever, and he knew it was going to cost him.

But he couldn’t help it.

Ever since he was nine years old, he fantasized about wearing diapers. He discovered he was a Diaper Lover and he hated it. Adrian Hale had, for six years, discovered how little he liked himself. He was a loser, had no social skills, was a terrible student and now he was a freak. He had no friends, and he was a freak.

He was a walking recipe of disaster.

“Adrian, what’s wrong?” asked his harsh mother, Amelia, as she walked into the room to see Adrian as a nervous wreck.

Sadly enough, Adrian was also emotionally unstable. He cried hard as his mother realized her pathetic son was crumbling down. Amelia was never proud of her son, she was never good with him and ever since his father died in the military, she had thought of her son as a burden. A burden she didn’t want to carry, but felt obliged to.

“Mom, there is something very wrong with me,” said Adrian, looking guilty. He couldn’t control his sadness anymore. “I…”

“You…” continued his mother, waiting for him to continue.

“I… I…” began Adrian, but he couldn’t bring himself to tell her. How would she react? Would she ever accept him if she knew he liked to wear diapers and was sometimes turned on by it?

“Spit it out, Adrian!” exclaimed Amelia, losing her temper.

“I like to wear diapers, and it’s somewhat of a sexual fetish for me!” said Adrian as he spat it out before he could control himself. He blushed crimson deep as he realized his mother was staring to him in horror.

“What?!” asked his mother as she stared down at her son in shock and disbelief.

“I’m so sorry, Mom…” said Adrian as he sobbed. He really sobbed. He was heartbroken, because his mother was looking like she had been slapped on the face. “I’m so sorry. I don’t meant to be this way! I don’t want to be this way!”
Amelia looked down at her son. “You’re disgusting…”

That didn’t help to stop the tears. That didn’t help to make him feel better. He felt like shit, yesterday’s garbage, nothing at all.
“I know I am,” said Adrian. “I’m sorry, please…”

“Out,” said Amelia, as she pointed her hand to the door, with her index finger pointing to the exit. To the street. “Out!”
Adrian realized what was happening. His mother was kicking him out. And he deserved it, because he was not a worthy person. He was a freak. Even though there were many Diaper Lovers in the world, he felt like he was not worthy of being loved. Who in their sane judgement would love someone with a condition like that one?

So Adrian left, not really having where to stay, but it was something he would have to figure out on himself. He would have to fend for himself from now on, even though he hated the idea of it. He was a monster.
And a monster should be left alone.

Adrian was looking for food, he was hungry.

He was hungry, and he was alone. He had been trying to survive in the cold streets of Miami, but it was pretty hard. He was trying to fend for himself, but his mother had kicked him out, and he was left to his own devices. He thought he was deserving of it, though. He found himself repulsive and thought that this was his punishment for being a deviant. He was a deviant and he couldn’t embrace that.

It was against everything he’s been taught.

So there he was, in the park, looking for food in the trashcans, wondering how it would be to feel safe and secure again. For a moment, the image of being in a diaper flashed on his mind and he remembered when he was loved, by his father, before he died in the war. He closed his eyes and for a moment he drifted away, he drifted away into a state of mind of bliss.

If only his father, who loved him, was alive, he would make him feel better.

But then, the sound of the honking of the cars snapped him out of his trance, and as he realized that he was thinking of being in a diaper and he felt disgusted again. It showered him with dark feelings, of self-loathing and rejection.

“Son, you alright?” asked someone.

Adrian blinked as he realized someone was staring at him. It was a man with a toddler in his arms, a man that looked kind hearted and his eyes showed him compassion. Adrian sighed. “Sorry sir, just looking for food…”

“Then why don’t you go home?” asked the man, holding the toddler tight against his chest.

Adrian felt embarrassed. “My mother kicked me out.”

The man’s eyes softened, looking at him with sadness. “It’s alright, son. Some people are not cut to be parents and are completely disgusting people.”

“Maybe I’m the disgusting one,” said Adrian, but it was so soft the man didn’t hear him.

The man, Mitch, looked at him and saw a good kindred boy. “Why don’t you come home with me?”

Adrian looked at Mitch shocked. “What? But you don’t even know me!”

“I’m not about to let you here in the freezing cold and die of starvation,” said Mitch as he urged Adrian to follow him. “Come on.”

Adrian smiled. “Thank you sir.”

“Call me, Mitch.”

Re: Of Infantile Habits (Chapter 2 Up)

Any progress with this story

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