Hello guys! So, I’ve been a long time lurker of this site, but I love a lot of the stories found here. They are more than just diaper stories, they have full plot and stuff worthy of someone’s time. So, I am a published writer by some major publishing houses, but I’m also an ABDL so I decided to write my first ABDL story, see if it get’s anywhere. I would love your comments and reviews! My plan is to post a chapter or two every week.
I will add a synopsis later on as the story starts shaping itself.
Have a wonderful 2017!
BTW: I’m looking for a proofreader, if someone wants to chip in, by all means, contact me!
Of Infantile Habits
It all starts when you’re very young.
You don’t understand, you try to but you’re just drawn. When you’re a child, you look around and see all the children playing to be superheroes. You see them playing with cars, riding their bikes and running around. But you’re different and you don’t understand why. Instead of wanting to play to be a superhero, a racecar rider or a firemen, you look for something else. A inviting temptation you can’t understand.
And then you see them, the babies. They’re in their mothers’ arms, or in their father’s lap. They’re playing with toys, baby toys. You look around and even though you’re just seven years old, you try to understand. Why do you feel so drawn to the way babies are treated? You see mothers bottle feeding them, toddlers sucking their pacifiers or their thumbs. And you don’t understand but you want to be one of them.
But then you stare at the other children and you realize you want to be like them. But you can’t, because there is something strange going on with them.
You realize you are staring at the babies’ diapers, and you can’t control yourself. You look at yourself and you realize you want to be diapered too. You want to be cuddled too. You want to be taken care of.
And then comes dad, who tells you how proud he is you’re growing up, and you feel guilty. Guilty of wanting to be a baby. Because everybody is expecting you grow up. Everybody is happy to know you’re a healthy seven year old starting grade school, but you don’t feel that way. You feel different, you feel wrong.
You feel you’re not up to their expectations. You feel little. You look at your brothers, or your sisters, and they’re normal. They are normal. You’re not. You’re seven year old and you want to be babied. Something must be wrong with you, right? Why can’t you feel normal like they are? And then you’re wondering why it is so wrong.
Because people don’t understand, and you don’t understand.
And yet… you can’t change who you are inside.
Michael Logan was a normal thirteen year old, he was one of a kind. A+ student, he was even invited to go to the most prestigious schools. He was very good looking, and many girls were looking to go out with him. Even though they were just thirteen year olds, the idea of dating burned in the mind as the hormones of those teenagers got awry. There was a girl named Rachel who wanted to kiss him badly, and she publicly displayed that desire.
Michael was in the soccer team, so it was obvious she would feel very interested in the most popular guy at school. But Michael wasn’t interested. Not because she wasn’t pretty, she was pretty. But Michael had other things in mind. Michael had decided that he wanted to focus on his studies and try to avoid girls as much as possible. Yes, he was irresistible, with that brunette hair and green eyes, he was candy for the eyes.
But the boy harbored a secret, and he felt terrible about it.
As the class ended, Michael stepped up, he had a nervousness inside of him. It was the best time of the day. The end of classes and he didn’t have soccer practice, so he had the whole evening to himself since his parents were in a meeting with his younger brother, Jason. Michael said goodbye to his friends and walked out of the school building, feeling his heart pounding.
Michael’s parents were both working people, his father was a business entrepreneur and his mother was a school teacher and they were pretty successful. Jason was eleven, just two years younger than Michael. They got along pretty well, but boys were boys and sometimes fights would break out. But all in all, he thought his family was alright. As much as a thirteen year old thought family was cool.
As the young boy, barely a teenager, walked home, he stopped at the local market. He entered, greeted by the sound of the beeping machines as the clerks marked the product in their system. Michael felt really stupid for a moment, for what he was about to do was unthinkable for a thirteen year old.
He was going to buy diapers.
Michael didn’t understand, but ever since he was a little kid, probably five, he fantasized about being a baby again. He didn’t want to be a baby all the time, he felt stupid and wrong. But in the past years, he would discover many things about the world and about himself. He realized that he couldn’t stop it. Every time he saw a baby getting its diaper changed or being bottle-fed, he felt the burning desire to be like that.
And he felt terribly guilty. But at the same time, he could feel his world changing. He was growing up, and many changes came with teenage. He realized he couldn’t hide forever, so he looked on the internet for people who could help him. One day, he found out more than he would imagine. He found out that he wasn’t the only one.
There was a whole community of people who liked to wear diapers and be babies. They called themselves Adult Babies, Teen Babies, and Diaper Lovers. Thanks to the world of connection and online support, Michael realized he was not that bad. There were many, many people who shared his interest. And none of them could explain why they felt that way, they just did.
Michael’s heart was pounding with nervousness, because he had reached the baby aisles.
After so many heart-wrenching moments, Michael decided that he was not going to let his infantilism (the technical term) deter him from being happy. So he was going to embrace that side of him, even if it had to be in the privacy of his room. He had started accounts on social media to meet other people online. Some were pretty weird, but others were really nice and understanding. They were amazing, and they supported him.
So Michael looked around and found a teddy bear. He looked at it, and it was inviting him to hold him. Michael’s heart was racing. Michael’s hands were sweating. There was something about that teddy bear that was calling out for him. So he grabbed it and looked at it. He had spent the whole summer washing cars and cutting grass to save for this. He couldn’t back down.
While putting the teddy bear around him, he walked to the next aisle to find what he was initially looking for: pacifiers and diapers. He really didn’t know which one he should take, they were all very pretty. He knew he couldn’t fit in baby diapers, so he chose the big boy pull-up and some adult diapers. He had money for both bags.
Heart racing, again.
So he had the most important item in his arms, there was just one thing missing, the cherry of the cake: a pacifier.
He looked around, and found the perfect baby blue pacifier. It was the biggest size so he thought it would be good for him.
With the three items on his hands, he walked towards the register to buy his items. Michael was really nervous, afraid someone would see him, afraid someone would realize he was buying all that stuff for himself.
Michael finally reached the counter, and the clerk lady looked at him curiously, but said nothing as he finally paid for everything he’d bought.
He turned around, and saw one of his school friends, Damian, stare at him with curiosity, however with a smile on his face.
Michael tried to hide his stuff. “Oh, hi Damian.”
“Fancy seeing you here,” said Damian as he approached him, he was carrying a bag of junk food, and some sodas. “Do you live close? I’ve never seen you around…”
Michael didn’t know what to say.
Damian’s eyes darted towards Michael’s bag, and unfortunately, the diapers could be clearly seen, as well as the plushy and the pacifier. “I didn’t know you had a baby sibling…”
Michael found his mouth dry. “Oh, yeah, a baby sibling. Yeah, it’s… my cousin, actually…I…”
“Those pull-ups are large size,” said Damian and looked at him confused. “How old is he?”
Michael stopped and took a deep breath. “I have to get home, Damian. I… I’m running late. Catch up with you later?”
Damian was surprised by Michael’s cutting behavior, but he nodded and smiled at him, patting him in the shoulder. “It’s alright, Mike, see you later then.”
Michael took a deep breath and walked out of the store, feeling like he was going to pass out of nervousness. He had tried so much to hide it, but he was a lousy actor. Anyhow, he walked home, thinking. I hope he doesn’t mention this to anyone, I’m a lousy liar.
However, he relaxed after a while. After all, why would Damian tell anyone something as insignificant as this? It was just his paranoia.
Michael walked home, relieved to find it empty. He knew his parents would probably be out all day and Jason was in detention for the afternoon. His little brother just couldn’t stay out of trouble.
The teenager rushed to his room, which was full of posters of his favorite superheroes, although he was seriously thinking on redecorating to put up some rock bands’ poster’s he liked. He was once again trembling, out of excitement and adrenaline.
He quickly opened the bag of adult diapers, and stared at them. He had never seen an adult diaper before, so he couldn’t believe it. They were huge, they would totally fit him. Michael then unbuckled his belt and removed his pants, his hands sweating again. He was going to wear a diaper for the first time since he was a baby.
With only his boxers, he rushed towards his parents’ bathroom and grabbed baby powder they used for prickly heat. He rushed back to his room and then he flopped down on the bed. He removed his boxer shorts, and his t-shirt. He was left in nothing, he was stark naked. He felt ridiculous but he was so anxious.
Then, he laid his lower half upon the diaper and started to powder his thighs and private parts. He felt elated as the scent of baby powder reached his nose. Michael knew he wanted to smell that forever.
Finally, he put the diaper upon his crotch and taped it. One tape first, then the second, then third and finally the fourth. He sat up, the diaper was so comfortable. He felt comfortable. It was so thick and plastic backed and he couldn’t help but giggle like a baby as he tried to close his legs and find it impossible.
He jumped out of bed and found himself toddling towards the mirror, where he stared at himself. He looked like an oversized baby, and he adored it. Wearing diapers felt much better than he imagined. He had been told in the forums how good it felt, but right now, he couldn’t put in words how amazing it felt.
He admired his padded butt for a few minutes, and his smile was wider than ever.
Finally he opened the package of the pacifier and stared at it for a minute, he realized he was hypnotically staring at it. He popped it in his mouth and then he started sucking. At first it felt foreign, but then he realized he was in love with the feeling. He already sucked his thumb in secret, so sucking a pacifier felt nothing strange now that he thought about it. It felt just as good.
He found himself sucking rhythmically.
Michael grabbed his new teddy bear and hugged it, sucking his pacifier and crawling into bed. He wanted to feel like that forever, but he knew he couldn’t. He had to grow up, and he was okay with that. But for a minute, he wanted to relish on the fact that he was a big baby. He enjoyed being a big baby.
He set his phone’s alarm to sound within the next hour, and then he put the covers over himself.
Hugging his teddy bear, who he decided to call Jimmy, as he sucked his pacifier and drifted to sleep.
For the first time in years, he slept like a baby.
One hour later, he woke up.
He had to pee.
Michael stared at the ceiling for a moment, realizing he was sucking on a pacifier and hugging Jimmy tightly against his chest. He realized he was wearing a diaper, and for a moment he felt ridiculous. But it was the first time he had indulged in his baby desires, and it was the first time he had actually worn a diaper. And it felt so good.
He decided he had to wet it. It was not a choice. He had to. He felt inclined to. It took some time and effort to relax his bladder, but finally, he let loose and felt the warm tingling sensation engulf his crotch and butt and thighs. He felt amazing. And then the smell of pee reached him, and he realized it wasn’t so bad.
Michael was a baby inside, and being a baby by himself for the first time was amazing.
He looked at the time, and he realized his family might arrive any minute now. He sighed, he had to change and he didn’t want to. He wanted to enjoy his wet diaper a little more. He squished his legs, feeling the warmth and sighed, getting the pacifier out of his mouth.
He toddled out of his bed, refreshed after his nap, and finally put everything away. He hid Jimmy, the pacifier and the bag of diapers and pull-ups. Now all he had to do was change and put on some clothes.
Relishing on the baby-ness of the diaper, he sighed and ripped the tapes and cleaned himself with some wet toilet paper. Then he put his clothes back on.
He put the diaper in a garbage bag and disposed of it in the street’s garbage can, just in time to see his parents’ car park.
His mother, Malia, and his father, Robert, pulled out of the car. Jason opened the back door and stepped out of the vehicle.
“Hey mom, hey dad, hey rat.”
Jason rolled his eyes. “What’s up rat?”
“How was detention?” asked Michael with a smile.
“Boring,” said Jason, and then he looked at his older brother. “Wanna play some videogames with me?”
He kissed his mother and father in the cheek, Michael was always very affectionate. They greeted him back the same way and the Logan family stepped inside, ready to spend some time together after a busy day.
“So, how was your day?” asked Malia, the brunette haired woman, young and wise and full of love. “Did you do something special?”
Michael lied. “Nope, nothing special at all.”