It’s been 3 months since the members have been mentally regressed into babies, and taken in by a retired nursery worker and often her husband. The two are no match for a growing newborn and a baby and five crazy toddlers.
Warning: too much fluff and references
It’s been 3 months since. And things are still the same, if not worse.
Suga is even heavier on her thigh, laying up against her with his arm wrapped around her shoulder. His forehead is literally glued down to her neck, with his hair and cheeks fluffed up into her face. Wooden blocks slowly slip out of his fist and pocket as he falls asleep for the third nap today.
On her other shoulder, J-hope is curled up against her, drooling and muttering to himself. Her hand still has to support his head, but now she’s learned to hold him at the neck and stroke her fingers through his hair. His little eyes flutter above his puffy cheeks as he smiles. It still looks like a reflex to her, but maybe he’s starting to dream.
Just then, V bolts past RM nearly knocking him off his giant tricycle. “Eeeom-maa!” He approaches mom, and his tie flails around as puts his hands on his hips. “Eom-ma!”
Mom starts to bounce Suga before he can start whining. She sighs, “Are they fighting again, Tae Tae?”
V looks back as Jimin tumbles and rolls his way into the living room, screaming for his help again.
Jimin blinks and waves his arms around dramatically. “Tae, Omma! Din in Kookie begroom.”
The Mario Kart music is at full blast and now Suga is growing fussy, but she’s getting used to it and can already hear the bickering.
Mom gets up from the couch. She hates to let Suga down on the rug to fuss. She takes a whimpering J-hope to the playpen in the corner, and lays him down with his head in a nursing pillow.
Jimin immediately skips to the playpen. J-hope’s ducky feet kick him through the bars with cycling legs as he grunts with a sleepy smile. Jimin’s sticky hand fluffs through J-hope’s hair like Mom does. The little one tucks his legs inside his footie pajamas and his whimpers go quiet.
Jimin dismisses himself to go tumble on top of Suga, trying to soothe his bottled rage.
When he notices Kumamon’s face peeking out from under the couch, he pulls out the 2 inch pacifier.
He wiggles it around in Suga’s lips before Suga pushes Jimin’s hand away. He snatches the pacifier for himself.
Meanwhile Mom barges into Jungkook’s room. She has her hands on her hips, and the two know she means business.
Jin is hovered over Kookie, who’s kneeled and almost hanging from Jin’s hoodie sleeve. They’re both clutching Jin’s new blue controller as they stare up at Mom with guilty smiles.
“Jungkook, give him his controller back.”
Kookie sniffles and fidgets with the buttons. “You seem forget, I gamer too.”
Jin squints down at Kookie over his glasses. “I said 5 minutes as I pottied. It’s been 7.”
Kookie tries to wriggle the controller away, but Mom wraps her arm around his tummy and pulls him over. Her finger pulls his waistband out so she can check his Spider-Man pull-up.
“Hmm,” says Mom.
Jungkook bursts out giggling behind his bunny teeth, trying to get away from her hand accidentally tickling his back.
“I think it’s time for a new one. Say, Iron Man?”
He sniffles. “Yeah!” He backs into her, nearly sitting on her and kicking his legs out.
When she lets go of him, Kookie shoos Jin out and shuts the door with both hands.
“Good job, Jungkook.” He knows privacy matters. Next thing she knows, he’ll be attempting to potty like Suga, then using the potty just like Jin… and hopefully Tae will follow, albeit late.
Kookie hurries to his shelf and digs through the pile of pull-ups to find Iron Man. He pushes his butt up against the changing table with his hands pressed on the pad, struggling to pull himself up.
She wraps her arms around him and lifts him up slightly above waist level, then wiggles him around playfully to get him all the way on the table. She collects all the materials and locks the rails to begin.
Someone smacks the door. And then someone else twice. The door opens and RM marches in. Behind him is Jimin’s butt, as he drags Suga in like a dead starfish.
Mom already has Kookie’s pants down. Kookie is reaching for Jimin while wrestling his pants off with his feet.
Jimin drops Suga and rustles his hair out of his eyes. He says, “He sleep. No potty.”
V sees them and comes in. “HI HI HI!”
“We change. V help!”
“No, boys. I’ll change him. Go take pictures of the new TV.” Despite it being mounted to the wall, with a transparent cage.
Mom undoes Kookie’s pull-up. She folds a clean part up to collect some fresh pee. The two smile at each other as it tickles. He stretches over to the pack of wipes but he can barely pull out a wipe with his fumbling fingers.
The diaper is set out of his reach. She puts a cloth over his parts in case he pees, though he hasn’t recently. Reaching over him, she pulls out three wipes and hands them to him to hold (in his mouth) while she closes the container.
Mom holds his crossed ankles to his chest and takes a wipe down his crack as he squirms. He hugs his own legs against him so she can unfold the clean pull-up and tuck it under him. Then he can splay his legs out on each side of her as she cleans every little crease gently.
She throws the wipes into the dirty pull-up while she takes the other side of the cloth to pat him dry.
All he needs now is raspberry on his belly and a generous amount of powder. He’ll pull the front of the diaper up as she pulls the sides tight and tapes his tiny waist.
His legs curl up, resisting the idea of pants.
Next Mom looks at Suga. Still asleep. The smell is very very faint.
She lets Kookie off the table. When he starts waddling off, her hand grabs his wrist and turns him back around.
“You can play with Jin, but you be nice.”
“No taking stuff.”
And she sends him on his way.
She cleans the table off. No need to roll the dirty diaper, the diaper genie is full and needs emptied.
Of course, RM notices and runs in. “I will get the trash!”
“What?” There’s a snap, and his hand pulls away with the trash handle. “Uh oh.”
She takes it out of his hand and sighs. With a scruff to his hair, she sends them out so she can go pick up Suga.
She tucks his head into her neck. With her arm under his padded butt, she wraps her other arm around his back under his armpit, and holds him close. Suga instantly melts into her like warm candy. His breathing steadily bounces off his pacifier guard. He really doesn’t need changed, he wants is to snuggle and sleep. And she really can’t blame him.
Mom leans into the changing table so she can sway him back and forth, and a little side to side. She hums into his fluffy hair as quietly as she can go.
His eyes flutter and he whines towards the door. I know she can hear it too, J-hope crying. Jimin won’t be able to talk him down for long.
“Koongi Woongi, you want a baba waba?”
He gives a little nod. He braces his hands against her chest so she can put him down on the changing table and give him a kiss and tell him she’ll be right back.
The minute she’s in the kitchen, Jin and V nearly bump into her.
She opens the cupboard to get the kumamon bottle and an anti colic bottle. She has to go into the dishwasher for the long teats and caps.
“Omm, I want hot choco.”
“Just a minute, Tae.”
She grabs the tin of Ensure powder and meticulously measures before getting the water.
Kookie teleports to her side, with his hands on the counter. “I want eat.”
Mom has a bottle in each hand, with her fingers blocking the flow so she can shake them. “Lunch time in 5 minutes. Go see if Jimin wants a bottle.”
At the cue of lunch, RM runs in. He throws his arm up on the top shelf, hoping to get a grown-up book.
Jin pushes past Kookie. “Yeah, let’s cook something.” He moseys to the shelf and struggles a few cookbooks down onto the table. He finds the one with chicken on the cover and flips it to a random page, when the two boys put their fingers on a random spot to start reading.
RM announces, “Chicken with dum-p-lings so-ooouup!”
Jin fidgets his glasses and momentarily pouts, and then sees his OTF. “Chicken breast.”
V comes to the table. He pulls the book closer, and immediately pushes it away. “Eeky. Ahcky.”
Kookie desperately waddles over to see what’s going on. “Bred I halp! I help.”
Suddenly there’s a RIP. V looks up at Mom. He surrenders a ripped page with a curd smile.
“Oh, Namjoon. Just put it with the rest and be careful.”
She looks at all of them at the table, like the Scooby-Doo gang hovered over the book with their months draped open.
“Don’t touch anything. I’ll make lunch when I come back. Whoever is good can help.”
Kookie waits until she leaves and waves his arms out, especially sneering at Jin. “Awight ewywun, be goond. No stupind.”
Jin squints his eyes.