Molly’s Deep Dark Secret
Mrs. Weston looked at the little first grader sitting in front of her. She had met Molly just that morning and had probably spent less than 20 minutes with her, but what she said next would have significant impact on little Molly’s life. Molly looked so helpless and little, like a tiny preschooler looking to an adult to make everything right again. Mrs. Weston had been a Special Education teacher for many years and faced many challenges throughout those years, the struggle in helping a child figure out if they are ready to grow up or not is always one of the hardest jobs. Whatever she said, would also be overheard by a few other kids in the room who were struggling with similar issues of figuring out if they were a big kid or a little kid.
There were a few points that could not be ignored however, Mrs. Weston had just changed Molly’s very wet and messy diaper. From what she had been told, Molly rarely, if ever, knew when she was messy. She may need diapers or some type of protection or medical device the rest of her life to deal with this issue. During the diaper change, Molly was sucking her thumb and returned to the classroom still sucking on it. Was Molly a big girl? Mrs. Weston knew that it all depended on how you look at it. It also depended on whether or not Molly wanted to be one.
Mrs. Weston looked around the room and saw everyone working, even though she knew they were all listening. “Molly,” she started. “You are a big first grader. Needing diapers does not change that.”
“She thinks she’s a baby because she wears diapers! Boy she has a lot to learn.”
Molly turned to see who it was that just said that. She knew it was a boy, and it sounded like a kid older than her. Was she about to get teased for pooping in her diapers?
“Jonathon,” Mrs. Weston promptly responded. “Today is her first day of wearing diapers to school, she is only use to wearing them at home. Now just because you have always worn diapers to school, that doesn’t mean you didn’t struggle with some of the same issues she is now dealing with.”
“Sorry Mrs. Weston,” Jonathon said meekly, as he turned back to the work on his desk.
Molly looked at Jonathon. He was a big kid a LOT older than her. He wore diapers?
As Molly contemplated this, a girl about Molly’s age came up to her and with a meek smile had a teddy bear held out to Molly. Very quietly she said, “Honey helps me when I am sad about my Pull-Ups.”
As Molly took the teddy bear, the girl’s smile got real big and she quickly went back to her seat. Molly turned back to Mrs. Weston and saw a big smile on her face. Molly hugged the bear, Honey.
Although Molly wanted to return to class and get out of this strange room with a bunch of kids she didn’t know, Mrs. Weston insisted that she stay for a little bit. Snuggling with Honey, Molly was lost in her own thoughts as Mrs. Weston talked to her. After a few minutes, she had Molly go over and helped Steven with his math.
Steven was working on counting little plastic teddy bears. He took a card off a stack and then had to put that many teddy bears into a bowl. Molly quickly found out he had trouble with any number bigger than 5. Without ever loosing her grip on Honey, she helped him get the right number of teddy bears into the bowl. It was real easy for Molly. Steven was different than the other first graders. Molly’s mom called him ‘special’. Molly didn’t know why he was called that, but he was a lot of fun to help and play with. He always liked playing with the little kid stuff, and no one teased you when you played with ‘baby’ toys if Steven was there. Molly always enjoyed playing with Steven and helping him.
Soon it was time for Molly and Steven to go back to the first grade classroom. Steven stopped at the doorway to Mrs. Weston’s room and looked at Molly. “Honey likes to stay in Mrs. Weston’s room.”
Molly looked down at Honey who was still tightly gripped under her arm. She smiled and then headed over to the girl who leant him to her. Giving Honey back, Molly leaned in and quietly said, “Honey is really good at helping, Thanks.”
Smiling Molly returned to Steven and they both headed back to their first grade classroom. When they got back to the classroom, Steven quietly walked in and sat down at his desk. No one seemed to notice him, but everyone was looking at Molly as she made her way back to her desk.
Molly quickly got into the lesson and was again enjoying her day without worrying about the reality of being in a diaper. They finished their morning lessons and went off to lunch. Flora and Molly ate lunch together and enjoyed playing on the playground afterwards. They played together all recess and on their way back in afterwards, the teacher stopped Molly and tugged on her ear. Molly’s cheerful expression faded as she turned and headed to Mrs. Weston’s room.
When she entered, only three kids were there. There was the big boy who wore diapers like her, a girl about the same age as the boy, and another kid she had never seen before. During the diaper change Molly had a lot of questions for Mrs. Weston about the two other kids in diapers, but instead just put her thumb in her mouth. Her wet diaper was quickly changed and Molly was sent back to class, but first Mrs. Weston said she should take her thumb out of her mouth before getting back to class. She quickly removed her thumb before leaving Mrs. Weston’s classroom.
Walking back into class, Molly felt that everyone was looking at her. When she sat down at her desk, Sue leaned over and whispered, “Where were you?” Molly didn’t answer; she just quickly got to work on the worksheet sitting in front of her. Molly tried real hard to focus on her work. She didn’t look at anybody. She didn’t look up at the teacher. She just looked down at her desk and did her work.
Molly still felt depressed by the time the class went to Music class, so she sat at the back of the room. She didn’t even want Flora sitting next to her. In the middle of class she had to pee, but there was NO WAY she was going to ask Mr. Farstone to go down to Mrs. Weston’s class so she could get help to go potty. Molly went in her diaper, figuring it was better than the alternative.
Back in her first grade classroom, Molly continued her avoidance techniques. Sue who sat next to her leaned in and whispered, “What’s wrong Molly?” Molly didn’t respond. She didn’t even look at Sue.
Molly continued working and ignoring everyone and everything. The teacher was circulating around the room helping kids do the assignment. Just before afternoon recess the teacher stopped at Molly’s desk and leaned down to her desk.
“You are doing real well on your work Molly,” she said smiling at Molly.
At this compliment Molly looked up at the teacher with a slight smile. The teacher was smiling back but also pulled on her ear. Molly’s smile immediately disappeared. She quietly got up and started out of the room. On the way out she heard one of the kids ask her where she was going. She didn’t look at the kid and definitely didn’t answer. To her horror however, as she turned the corner out of the room she heard Steven answer the question.
“She is going to get her diaper changed.”