Let's talk about bullying and social situations

Okay, so most of my stories, the ABDL ones, the non-ABDL mature ones, the YAL ones, and even the fanfiction usually revolve around a protagonist being harmed or humiliated so badly that they start to hate society before being taken in by the villains, given magical powers, or finding friends who’ll stand up for them.

My question is do you have any tips on realistic ways a person can be bullied? I remember some of my own experiences as a child, and, honestly, they don’t make a lot of sense to my adult mind. It was like I might do one or two things to make people mad at me or think I was a bit “off,” and the rest of the time was spent ignoring people trying to take shots at me or dealing with isolation and exclusion. It usually resulted in me avoiding people and not even attempting to socialize, but it seldom had any truly lasting consequences beyond that, even if I revealed embarrassing details about myself or people caught me doing/saying embarrassing things. (Okay, there was this one time in elementary school when my friend tried to get revenge on me by sabotaging me, but we made up shortly after that) Are those kinds of revenge scenarios mostly just found in fiction?

I know this isn’t a Reddit forum, but if you have any suggestions on how I could make the bullying feel a bit more realistic so that you can sympathize with my protagonist more, I’d like to hear them. Bullying personal stories are welcome, too, if you’d like to share them. If not, okay, I understand.

The thing about bullying is there really are no limits, and in fact; the more absurd it is, the more likely a bully is to get away with it, specifically because of my second point.

And that second point is that most people ignore it. The parents of a bully don’t want to admit it because it makes them look bad as a parent, and other parents don’t want to take the issue to the parents of the bully because of the pushback they’ll receive.

If it’s school related, schools often just reprimand both parties because it’s easier than taking a side or trying to figure out what actually happened. Again, most parties largely just don’t want to deal with it, even to the point of concluding the bullied is just fabricating accusations because that’s just easier–again returning to my original point of the more outlandish it is, the easier it is to dismiss.

Me, I certainly received my fair share of bullying, and the above is based on that. I at least had a reputation for being honest, so there was at least some credibility to my claims of what someone did to me, but that only went but so far. In fact, some of the mistreatment I got was from adults who just lumped me in with the rest of the ass clowns my age.

Of course, that along with many false claims against me ended up putting me in the mindset that if I was going to get into trouble for something, I might as well get the satisfaction of doing it. So then I was a bully for a while. It’s a vicious cycle. I bullied a few kids, easy targets, or ones that had already started beef with me. I didn’t even like doing what I did, but so long as I was antagonizing them, it gave me the satisfaction that at least it wasn’t happening to me.

I stopped, of course, because I’m actually considerate of other people. In order to be a bully, you really need to disregard that entirely.

I’ve written two (I think) stories that dealt with bullying. (Those are my two Christmas stories.) They largely use the above, which is my observations and experience, as the basis for realism. I think they came out quite well in that regard.

But again, there are some truly horrible people out there, and for most everyone else, it’s easier to pretend it doesn’t exist than to accept that people can be as bad as they are. Only thing I would say to limit is the complexity of the abuse, and that’s dependent on the age/intellect of the bully. I’ve seen enough convoluted plots that could’ve registered far more believable if they’d worked it backward from an end goal.

If a bully is just being mean, it’ll likely be impulsive, not planned out. Therefore less complex. If a bully has a specific goal or reason for the bullying, then they’ll do whatever helps them achieve that goal, without consideration for their victim. Thus it may appear more complicated it premeditated, but it’s just the means to an end. For example, most of the crackpot conspiracy theories are just a misinterpretation of seeing inconsiderate people harm others for immediate personal gain.

Anyway, I’m rambling now. Hope it helps though.

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People can be creative when they want to be. Even when it comes to making someone’s life miserable.
I guess the answer to your question would depend on the people involved. Is the bullying diaper related?
Bullies pray on weakness. What weakness does your protagonist have? If your story takes place in present day you might think about cyber bullying. Hope this helps.

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Thanks. Does anyone have any ideas about ways to write humiliating situations without AB/DL elements? I usually default to stories of people being humiliated in ways regarding sexual or bodily function-related situations, but I’m pretty sure there are ways to include humiliation elements without sexual or bodily function-related elements. Relying on bodily functions and sexual things to explore bullying situations is kind of low-hanging fruit, you know?

Non-abdl bullying? The only limits are your imagination. Bullies can be very creative in their tactics. There’s physical and verbal bullying. Everything from rumors to social ostracization to the classic swirlies in the toilet, stuffed in a garbage can, knocking books out of hands when passing in halls. Social stuff- inviting all the girls in class except for one to a party, or no one shows up at X’s birthday to more insidious stuff like only pretending to be friends with the victim but actually just take advantage of them.

A good example- WB’s story The Pariah.

Thanks for the suggestion. I may take a look at The Pariah.

I also have another question. Recently, someone left a critique on a story I’m working on in the Diaper Dimension fandom claiming that the bullying scenarios I presented were not realistic. Do you have any suggestions on how I can make them better? Do I need to? I thought the emotions were pretty realistic, but maybe there’s something I left out? Maybe there’s something I’m not understanding about the dynamic or something about the interactions that the reader isn’t getting from what I wrote?

I’m not going to comment directly on the story in question as I’ve not read it. If I do, I’ll give feedback appropriately. :slight_smile:

However, it is entirely possible that your audience just doesn’t agree. That is, your story may be just fine. Not everything you write will register with everyone who reads it.

I’ve been tempted to backtrack and do over a bunch of things that people didn’t get. But if I wait and mull it over, I end up figuring out what I accomplished with a story and what I intended to accomplish. Sometimes the point of what I was getting at changed between when I started writing and when I finished. For that, I have to ask myself whether the point remained consistent throughout the narrative, or whether I got sidetracked. Getting distracted in your own writing can cause inconsistencies that leave your readers confused.

The bottom line is to reevaluate what you intended and whether you achieved that. It’s less important that someone thought something was unrealistic than why they thought so.

Just a thought.

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