Illogical 1-3

If you read my intro for The Sadists daoll (I will get on that after I finish Chriss and Chrissie which should be in the next post. Ya, it’s almost over.) I’m an impulsive writer. One night I was having insomnia (it happens a lot for me) I was coming up with story ideas and this one popped in my head. I liked the idea. I have never seen a story like this one here. Why kind of story you ask? A non-sense comedy, that kind. Joanna has to save another world from an evil witch who turned the whole world infantile. Can she save them? If people like it enough maybe I’ll write more and we’ll find out, or maybe I’ll do it anyway, though please tell me if you like it! Okay I have gone on long enough. And the usual tell me all the things I need to work on.

Chapter One: What the hell is going on?

My name is Joanna Cortez. I will tell you a little about myself. I am sixteen. I go to high school. My parents are from Jamaica. I think that there is a logical reasoning for everything. That everything done has a valid reason behind it. That science can deduce anything. However this journey of mine has shattered my views. When I woke up this morning I was expecting a normal day of school. However, now I am roaming around in a forest I have never been in dress like a witch only for a couple things, I am wearing a diaper, and my wand is a rattle. Allow me to back up to a few days ago.

Some friends of mine: Minnie, Jenny, and Stacy, decided to check an abandoned tunnel. They invited me along, but I had a math test the next day and saw superior results in studying over examining a stinky pipe where couples go to do it or something. Well the next day something was different about them. For one thing they were wearing diapers under there skirts (I didn’t know at the time). And over the next few days they showed up at school less and lass. One day I went over to Minnie’s house to drop off an essay assignment paper.

I rang the door bell and her mom answered the door. She had a distressed look on her face. I asked if I could see Minnie. “May I see Minnie?”

She answered no. “No!”

“Why not?” I asked.

“She’s … sick.”

“Is it contagious?”

“Yes!” She said lying through there teeth. I know when people are lying. it’s a gift I have I suppose.

“With what?”

“Chicken pox!”

“I had it when I was younger.”

“And the common cold!”

“I will risk it.” This kind of exchange went on for half an hour. “Miss, I need to explain our upcoming essay in science class or else Minnie is doomed to fail.” I neglected to mention the paper that explained all that. I was let in. There I saw it. Minnie was on the living room floor giggling like a little baby … wearing a diaper like a little baby (with Minnie Mouse on them no less. What won’t Disney sell out to?) … playing with baby toys (that belonged to her baby sister that finished potty training a week ago). “Minnie.” I greeted.

“Jowny!” She said with the irritably cute baby lisp. “Did you come to pway?”

“Come to pray? Why are you acting like a baby?”

“I dun no. A started peeing my swelf and then I started being like a bwaby! And now I am one.” Or act like one. At this point I got worried about my other two friends. I bolted out of the house and headed for the other two (good thing we all live close-by). I found the same results. They all had been reduced to drooling morons.

I was up all that night trying to figure out what was going on. Then something came up on the news.
An epidemic has been breaking out. Teenagers suddenly being reduced to diapers. Is it a disease? Scientists say no. Any connection to be found has been lost to the drooling babble that erupts from there mouths. However one connection has been found. Live at a no longer in use tunnel is Dian.

Thank you Tom. From what we gathered all of the victims have been in here at one point or another. Is it a curse? Me and my camera man are about to find out.[/i]

When they entered the connection was cut. My friends went there, but how can a tunnel do this? Curses? Those don’t exist.

The next day, I checked the news again. Dian and the cameraman were not mentioned nor shown. The subject was dropped. Did those two suffer the same fate? Something is off.

The next day I stood outside the tunnel. I don’t believe in curses, especially one as absurd as making me infantile. Scientists detect nothing wrong with the body. Everything about it was … illogical! I hate illogical things. My heart bat rapidly as I took the steps forward. What would happen to me? Fear of the unknown. Fear of not understanding. I had on me a cell-phone, a flashlight, and a baseball bat for self defense. I ran in.

This is where things stop making sense.

Chapter 2: What the hell just happened?

I emerged in a forest. Only the trees and grass was pink. A mutation in the pigment? That’s the only explanation. I looked around. So far nothing. Everything seemed fine at the time. Then I found a couple bear cubs. They approached me. They seemed harmless. I petted one. Then I saw from behind a tree, a much bigger bear. The mamma bear? I assumed that. Various wildlife documentaries of momma bear’s ferocious temper came to me. I froze in fear, but the lethal claw didn’t come. She approached me and sniffed me like the cubs. I slowly walked away from them.

So far nothing had happened that could cause the infant syndrome as I will come to call it. I made my way to the tunnel, and that’s when things got weird. I was suddenly surrounded by … nurses (the big breasted bimbo kind with a revealing dress on too). They all looked exactly like each other too. Thoroughly creped out yet? They all talked at the same time. “Oh my, another baby!” I was confused by everything.

“Who are you?” I asked.

“The nurses, silly.” Of course.

A shadow loomed over me, literally. This strange woman in a pink dress with lots of ruffles came out of nowhere and landed in front of me. “Another one! Don’t you know the rules! In my world everyone must must MUST wear a diaper!” She said as she took out a wand. I was completely confused by everything. Then, she zapped me. I was enveloped in this strange light enveloped me. Suddenly, all I could think about was pissing myself, exploring my toes, and sucking tits. What the hell is going on!? Nothing at the moment made sense, and in my confusion I voiced that thought.

“What the fuck is going on!” I must have done something because everyone gasped and the glowing stopped. I looked around me. The nurses spoke all at once.

“Babies don’t curse!” Yah. Suuuuure.

“I’m not a baby shit-face.” A rather crude insult. They were all stunned once again and I bolted for it. I ran as fast as I could. I tripped. I thought the nurses and Miss. megalomaniac had caught me, but instead this which dresses woman was hanging over me. She gave me the shush sign, grabbed me, and we ran for it.

Chapter 3: What the hell are you telling me?

The costumed woman guided me to a house in the middle of the forest. I entered the eerily pink cottage. “Inside we are safe.” She told me.

“Who are you?”

“The great witch Maestra!”

“You’re a teacher?”

“No! A witch! Anyway you are the one the prophecy for-told.”

“You lost me.”

“Prophecy says that one day a girl shall emerge from the tunnel to another world and be able to fight off the evil witch that has done these horrible things to this world.”

“Do you mind explaining? Absolutely nothing you said made sense.”

"Fine. I shall explain.

About five years ago this world was a flourishing paradise. Magic was common and practiced by all. The princess of the world was a powerful witch. Everything she did she succeeded. However she had a secret. She liked to pretend to be a baby. However some bad people found out about this and blackmailed her. Eventually everyone found out and laughed at her. So using her powerful magic, she made everyone in the world act like a baby, even the animals. Now she, and her armies of homunculi dressed as nurses rule the world with an iron fist. However, a prophecy for-told that in this world bleakest moment, a girl carrying powerful magical curse words would appear and stoop the witch!

And there you have it. The witch that you saw earlier was the princess"

“That made no sense. First I’m assuming one king and queen ruled the entire world? That’s just not possible. Second off. Magic? Magic isn’t real. Thirdly, who reacts like that by turning the world infantile? Your story is full of holes and illogical concepts. And how do you even know I’m the bearer of these 'magic words.”

“Your words stunned the princess and her homunculi nurses.” Curse worlds. Curse words. How literal.

“Nothing still makes sense. You say she turned the whole world infantile? What about you?” She answered my question by lifting her skirt and revealing a diaper.

“My magic is the only thing keeping me from sucking my thumb (though it’s offly tempting).”

“Well how did she know I was here?”

“Her nurses are all interlinked like some kind of web. They have been spying on the portal. People from your world can come and go, but not for us”

“Wow… So what do you want me to do about it?”

“Go to her castle and destroy the magic jewel she made that keeps this curse on us all.”

“And if I refuse, leave, and dismiss this as a hallucination?”

“Well then you return to your world and start becoming like a baby.”


“You got hit by the spell.” That pink glow.

“How do you know it affected me?”

“Take off your pants.” A complete stranger just told me to take off my pants. “You want proof?” I very comfortably obliged. Where my underwear should be, I found a diaper. I bet that was a total surprise.

“Okay, explain please oh wise witch.”

“The curse is like a mild regression story on an ab/dl story forum. First your continence, then your ability to speak well, then your motor skills, and then you’re basically a drooling baby at the whim of the nurses.”

“What! But my friends were reduced within a week!”

“Calm down. Your magical curse words interrupted the spell before it took a complete effect. It will take a month instead of a week.”

“Can’t you stop it?”

“It can’t be stopped. I have made it my duty to wait here and prepare the destined one with the supplies needed to break the curse on our world.”

Really?" Am I really considering this? I don’t want to become infantile. I like being a smart independent growing girl that can use the bathroom. I don’t want to lie around all day and be a baby while people tend on me hand and foot. “How can you be sure it’s me? Those words aren’t anything special in my word. The words I used.”

“It has to be you, because my spell to keep me as adult as I can is about to wear out. It has taken a lot of magic to recast it year after year.” How long has she been waiting? “I will now give you what you need.” Huh? She took me to a back room. “This witch dress shall imbue you with a magical shield to protect you on your travels. It shall keep you warm in the cold, ward off smaller spells, and looks darling lovely.”

“Said witch dress has a rather high hemline.” I commented.

“It’ll make it easier to quickly change your diaper.”

“Huh? I thought you said I would take a month to kick in!”

“The incontinence is initial.”

“No w-” Just as I was about to finish … well I bet you can guess what happened. And if you’re so slow that you don’t know, I pissed myself. “Shit.”

“Oh my, that word felt powerful.” Weird. “Next is this witch hat! It will shade you from the sun. And some witch shoes to keep your feet comfy because you have a lot of walking ahead of you.” Great. “A witch cape to complete the outfit.” Of course. “Next is the witch diaper bag.” And you lost me.

“Witch diaper bag?”

“Yes, it has an infinite supply of diapers and has a plethora of bottles with potions in them just in case.”

“Bottles? As in baby bottles?”

“Just in case you forget how to use a cup.”

“How thoughtful.” I said with as much sarcasm I could muster.

“And last is your magic wand.” She handed me the rattle I mentioned earlier.

“It’s a baby rattle!”

“Really?” I don’t know how to react. “Well anyway you better get dressed.”



“Please leave. I don’t intend to strip in front of loony strangers.” Why am I doing this? I tried to fit the dress over my cloths, but it refused to fit. Damn.

“It’s supposed to only fist your body. It’s magical that way.” A floating teddy bear wearing a diaper had appeared in front of me. “I’m Ted. Pleased to mee’cha.”

“What the hell are you?”

“The witch’s familiar, and soon yours. I have to stick around with yas and show ya the ropes among other things.”

“Other things being?”

“I have to change your diaper.”

“I’ll do it myself.” I tried to take it off, but it felt stuck to my skin.

“Ya can’t. Part of the curse.”

“So I’m supposed to trust you to change me like a good little baby?”

“That’s the idea toots.”

“I hate you.”

“Yah yah save it for someone who cares. Now then, senses indicate you need a change.”

“You can sense when I piss myself?”

“And when you poop yourself and it only works on girls.”


“Sticks and stones may break my bones if I had any. Now let’s get that diaper off you.” I changed in front of the lecherous bear. I can’t shoo away something that can become intangible. “Change now?”

“I would rather put up with a wet diaper.”

“It’ll become more then wet as time passes.”

“Shut up.” I stuffed my cloths in a pocket in the diaper bag. I questioned myself why I was doing this again. I have to go break a magic jewel and free this world, my friends, and myself from this curse. This doesn’t make sense, none of this makes any sense.

Illogical 1-3


This was so unusual and in a lot of respects out right stupid, but it is so entertaining that I just have to have more.

Please post more of this as I need some light hearted humor in my life at the moment.

I suggest that you check the grammer as there are a few errors.

Illogical 1-3

I found some parts of the story to be somewhat clunky, and some of it really would benefit from a visual medium, but you’ve got some good one-liners in there, and good set up for the jokes. I’m enjoying it well enough.

Illogical 1-3

Um……what the fuck?

If this is supposed to be a joke of a story, I like it, nicely done thus far aside from grammar issues.

If this is supposed to be serious, BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Illogical 1-3

Nice story, it got some nice humor to it :slight_smile:

Illogical 1-3

Cool! My story is (somewhat I guess) a success! Yah, dont take anything that happens here seriously. This is a complete joke story because I never really saw one of those on here (well except for that one thats a parody of generic stories in the complete board section). Yah, I will do my best to adress the issues said here. I’m glad you all like it!

Illogical 1-3

Brilliant. It’s a combination of every standard ABDL story theme, hammered together in a fashion similar to yawgy’s tale.

Illogical 1-3

It’s like crack. It’s killing my brain, but I still want more!

Illogical 1-3

I’m addicted more, more, more…