How do people view your ABDL interest, the ones that know about it and acknowledge it.
A short term friend of mine was a little public with her interest - short skirts, playing bottomless outside. Etc
A few of my neighbors know I have my feet in this stuff but don’t seem to care or just outright ignore it.
Maybe they think I’m pedo or something
How about you?
-No more than three people ever knew about it.
-It’s getting close to twenty years since I realized it wasn’t “acceptable” and started actively hiding it.
-One of the people who knew, got in a wreck, fell into a coma, and awoke with no memory of me or anything about this interest. (along with most all of her other memories too)
So yeah, hopefully no one knows at all.
I don’t, and have never had a close enough friend to open up to about this. (or any of my personal feelings, really)
They’d probably think I was pedo too. I don’t need that, so they don’t need to know.
Half the battle is your level of confidence when speaking of it. I discussed it with some longtime friends of mine, and they were interested to know what it was about, what the attraction was, how it all worked. At the end of the day, they respected it. Of course, four years removed, one of them cut all his friends off when he got into a Norse paganism cult, and the other committed suicide, so I’m not sure how good an example that was.
If you really want to get comfortable discussing it, get involved with your local BDSM scene. They’re far more accepting than any vanilla people ever will be.
I hope they don’t even suspect. I don’t really show off my ABDL side. Which means, I don’t share my ABDL stories, and I don’t openly wear or talk about my diapers with others. If I dated, it might come up in conversation, but quite frankly, I don’t see sharing that aspect of my life even with someone I was dating.
Professionally I’m never going to tell anyone what am I crazy? Personally well its a different story
I was put into a situation last year where I was more or less forced to “come out” to my mother a couple of my very close friends aunts, uncles cousins (first generation) I explained the situation on an individual basis at first and then in small groups. It actually helped them dot the eyes and cross the t’s of my various personality quirks. They don’t understand the diapers but they know me and they didn’t reject me and considering the conservative religious nature of their belief structures that came as a very unexpected surprise.
The only negative reaction I got was from my father who called me “sick” but hell he’s a drunken asshole and the reason why I have daddy issues in the first place so fuck him.
No one in my family knows. I honestly don’t want to tell them. It’s unnecessary to do so and it just creates an awkward tension where there was none prior.
My girlfriend and a few online friends know. My girlfriend, for obvious reasons and my online friends are all into kinks anyway.
One real life friend found out by accident because facebook fucked up and what was supposed to be a SECRET group was advertised on his sidebar, saying I was in a DD/lg group. He thought it was some glitch and I was set to let him believe that but then I thought better of it and just explained. Eventually found out he has his own kinks so everything kinda worked out.
Ummm… Last I checked, this soul and quite a few others know by now. Connecting that with the flesh and blood human harboring that soul is another matter, though I suspect Renko could come pretty close if he wanted to.
If Renko hasn’t doxxed any of the troll writers by now I doubt he’ll dox anyone.
No one knows about me. I’ll have to tell a romantic partner at some point (if I don’t trust them with this it’s probably not going to work out). Being a sexual interest for me I can’t see why I’d tell any family or friends; unless it were a life or death situation (for example, if they revealed their struggle to come to terms with their own fetish). As far as I’m concerned it would be between me and my hypothetical partner; one of us shouldn’t tell anyone without the other’s consent.
I wouldn’t mind being out if there weren’t a stigma. I love this culture and these stories. I’d love to discuss it in a more professional setting: literature, psychology, etc. I’d love to bring my own insight into it.
But even without the stigma it’s a private matter and I wouldn’t want to put a partner under scrutiny for being with me – even if they do not participate. No one wants to be in a situation where friends and strangers are making assumptions about their sex lives.
Like I said, white hats look better on me than black
The closest I’ve ever come to doxing someone was a few months back when I had to report a kid who lied about his age because he was using his school email address and their internet service to access the board. Had someone forward a PM to me where the kid was trying to setup a meeting with them. I kind of didn’t report that part, but I did notify the school’s IT department that he was using his school email and internet to access this site which was a violation of the AUP. Hated doing it, but I hope that it was enough to make him think twice about that. The scary part (and the only reason I didn’t just ban him) was that the kid admitted to being only 12 in the PM and let’s just say the rest of the contents made it quite obvious that if something wasn’t done kid was probably going to a missing person report before much longer.
That sounds to me like a case where you pretty much had a(n identified) flesh and blood person behind the screen name at registration if you cared to check the domain. Hard to consider a whois on the email domain even very grey.
True privacy isn’t easy to come by. Sometimes real names show up and get released in unexpected places. I actually know Kita’s real name because I inadvertently found it in a publicly available place long ago. She knows where, when, and how because I told her. No one has found out from me, though, nor even how I found it - and don’t ask me. I’ll forward your message to Renko and Kita and let them decide what to take out of your hide. I’ll keep my hats white too, thank you.
FFS… sorry to hear that. It’s hard to imagine someone here take so little care in their privacy (although that guy who went through everyone’s email to find their facebook pages then sent them PMs about being more careful does show it may be common enough) but who knows what’s been going through his head. Mental illness does terrible things. At least that’s what I assume would lead someone to seek people like that.
Ouch. We can only make what seems to be the best choice at the time, but knowing that doesn’t always make it easier later. I can see that domain doesn’t leave much question as to who owns it and why.
The email address I use for the board probably requires law enforcement or court orders to trace back to me. As for the guy looking up FB profiles, that seems more a case of people not thinking about how much gets tied to an email address these days (and perhaps not paying attention to email visibility settings, not so good with a primary email address used here). Better a grey hat than a black hat, though (and hope the grey hat really got there first).
He’s the reason I ran UPDATE $prefifx_members SET hide_email=1; and then ALTER TABLE $prefix_members MODIFY hide_email DEFAULT 1;. When the board got updated to smf2 which allows disabling visible email addresses I immediately turned that on so you can’t even make your email address in your profile visible any longer. (Incidentally, profiles are actually completely hidden until you are off moderated posting these days.)